live in the current

peace in the little things

2012-02-09T22:27:00.001-07:00

i am coming off of a long, hard week and the hospital. i have been full-to-the-brim with chaos this week and have ended up working 10-11 hours days every day. this morning my alarm didn't go off at all and i woke up an hour later than planned. that little alarm signal was there, but apparently i pushed something wrong before i went to bed and set off a painful chain of events.

i can't think straight. i freak out about the most absurd things (that in hindsight are usually due to my oversight or error). it is time for me to sit down with a book and a few cups of tea. i need to recharge my introvert and savor my quiet side. brandon is heading out of town, my dearest laramie friends are all off galavanting about the globe, and i couldn't be more eager for the silence of this weekend.

i hate to admit how much the disorder of our house (following our mid-level renovation this past weekend) is getting to me. too much chaos in my work and in my head makes me crave a peaceful, calm, clean home. instead i have my kitchen haphazardly and temporarily rearranged, my dresser halfway blocking the closet, and piles of randomness spilling out all over the place. aiy!

my goal for the weekend is to find peace in shoring up some little things. like getting our taxes in order. rehanging things in the office we painted (and maybe blogging about that decorating update). and eliminating a few of these piles that are taking on a life of their own.

nagging tasks

2012-01-30T12:10:00.002-07:00

we spent all day yesterday working on house projects and i am officially exhausted.

brandon finished building our compost bin (all with salvaged/re-purposed materials!) which is a big step in my recently established zealous goal of reducing our waste output. i have been inspired by the zero waste family to minimize the packaging we bring into our house and maximize our composting and recycling. we are far from perfect, but i am trying to think about my actions a bit more. so the compost bin is one major piece in reducing our garbage. and making supplemental material for my summer garden. (just thinking about summer gardening makes me so excited!)

i decided to tackle a task that has been nagging me for a bit: removing [nasty] paint from the hardware in our house. this sounds minor and easy. in fact, it was a whole day process and i still have three door hinge/handle sets to work on. the skin along my nail beds is torn up and cracking. my back aches and i am pretty sure my hands are going to be stuck in their current claw like form from all the required scrubbing. but the results are pretty cool (thank goodness!). i used a cheap-o crockpot to get the paint off and followed this tutorial.

the latches in their purple-ish glory. be gone you nasty paint!

the hinges with a few of the screws removed.

(i haven't taken pictures sans-paint yet because we got done last night about 8PM and the lighting was awful.)

our house was built in 1928 and the doors and kitchen cupboards (along with their hardware) seem to be original. stripping the paint felt like an archaeological journey through the story of "this old house" as i learned the kitchen cabinets have previously been a pinkish Valentine's-Day-Card red, a pale country kitchen yellow, and are currently a purple-hinted grey. we plan to strip them down this summer and either stain or paint them. but we need longer and warmer days to tackle that DIY project.

somehow spending all day sunday (before family arrives this week) peeling paint off of the hardware seemed like a good idea. i am really glad i did it and happy with the outcome, but feel a little sheepish for my choice to do this non-urgent project when a few others should have been the priority. c'est la vie, right? there is a sweet reward in tackling a nagging task (which i learned here).

a decade makes a great start

2012-01-05T10:49:00.004-07:00

january 5th is a special day for brandon and i: the day we started dating. ten years ago. ten. whoa!

how did i get so lucky to find this incredible man, loyal friend, and devoted husband while i was still in high school? we have so many shared memories, and yet, it seems our lives together have just begun. i am grateful that i think of this past decade as just the beginning and that i still feel all googly-eyed about him.

---

i was thinking about what was going on in the world 10 years ago:

enrique iglesias' 'hero' was a popular song (that i am pretty sure i sang while thinking about brandon. gag.).
the enron trials were just beginning.
women everywhere thought they were rocking in their velour tracksuits. we later discovered that not even j-lo looks attractive in a velour tracksuit.
everyone we knew was forwarding us the doctored photo of the shark jumping out of the water at the Air Force chopper. and we forwarded it on to ten people for fear of sudden death if we didn't keep the chain mail alive.
americans were eagerly chowing down on bacon and blue cheese in hopes of atkinsing themselves into their skinny clothes.

predictability

2011-12-15T17:12:00.001-07:00

ugh, i think i am guilty of saying all of these things.

and i have those bangs.

sunday, 4:00
(sorry for the lame bathroom iPhone picture)

sunday, 4:15

happiness and its bad rap

2011-12-04T16:56:00.000-07:00

just this morning i finished the happiness project. i stumbled onto this book from brene brown's website, ordinary courage, and initially was quite resistant to the concept. i have never really been thrilled with arguments about how people should pursue happiness; it never seemed noble or honorable to work towards this {spoken like a true first-child with a martyr complex}.

despite my resistance to the book and the concept, intrigue won. i am glad it did. i find myself referencing this book at least five times a day in conversations with friends or family and i notice myself trying to incorporate little slivers of the author's happiness resolutions.

each month of the year the author set an intention for her life and established 3-5 measurable resolutions to work towards that intention. it sounds a bit hokey, but for me it wasn't. as i read the book i felt like i was reading my own journal towards personal betterment, the hurdles to the author's happiness are so similar to the hurdles in my personality and life.

at the end of the book she provides the following questions to inspire your own happiness project:

what makes you feel good? what activities do you find fun, satisfying, or energizing?
what makes you feel bad? what are sources of anger, irritation, boredom, frustration, or anxiety in your life?
is there any way in which you don't feel right about your life? do you wish you could change your job, city, family situation, or other circumstances? are you living up to your expectations for yourself? does your life reflect your values?
do you have sources of an atmosphere of growth? in what elements of your life do you find progress, learning, challenge, improvement, and increased mastery?

ultimately my view on happiness {and its pursuit} have shifted through reading this book. what i once thought a selfish endeavor, i now see that cultivating happiness in my life is a result of my choices and that my happiness can greatly improve the lives of those around me. as someone who has always internally condemned the airlines' guidance to first put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others, i am learning to see that by being happy i can help bring happiness into the lives of people around me. {and that's how i stealthily resolve my dissonance around personal happiness!}

--------------

on an unrelated note, the author included this excerpt from one of her blog readers and it fits me like a glove {and helps me see why my profession suits me so well}:

the way i bring people together is by connecting them via whatever may be of interest to them. i know i am gifted at connecting the dots and i use that skill in the relationships i build with others. i also have a tendency to collect and store what may seem like mundane information about people in my head. inevitably, i will run into someone who needs something, and because of the information i've collected i will have just the right person to introduce them to to help them achieve whatever they need. ironically, i am not a social butterfly at all, but i always seem to be able to connect people at the right time.

photos, finally.

2011-11-22T17:52:00.000-07:00

here are some pictures of our living room, which is the most finished of all the rooms of our new house. although the warm yellow/gold might be a bit much for some people, i wake up every morning thrilled with the paint color we chose! (bee by sherwin williams, if anyone is interested.)

a while back, i recovered that teal chair
in the corner and i love how it turned out!

my favorite corner of our house right now.

i picked this print up in santa fe this fall and i am so glad i did!

the view from the kitchen sink.

the pass through in all its glory!
(still waiting on barstools and ignore that internet
cable running across the floor. we obviously have a
bit of work left to do--like paint the trim on the pass-through!)

now on to work on other rooms so we can share photos of them!

initiation situation

2011-11-20T11:07:00.000-07:00

we have been properly initiated into the realm of diy homeownership. when we initially considered buying this house i knew that i wanted to open up the wall between the kitchen and living room by creating a pass-through/bar. my dad confirmed it would be "easy enough" so we proceeded with the plan one sunday morning, thinking it might take a day or two.

this is what the wall looked like on that fateful sunday morning.

one of the first problems we encountered was the plaster (concrete) walls. what we thought would be an enjoyable (dare i say therapeutic?) demoing project resulted in the demolition of two sawzall blades and a heavy dusting of our entire house. and two sinus-infections. the house was built in 1928, so we hope the walls predate asbestos.

the death of the sawzall blade and all we had was a 4" hole to show for it!

the walls in our house also feature lath beneath the plaster, so the demoing didn't go nearly as quickly as hoped because even when we broke up the plaster, we still had these wood slats to remove. as we hammered away, through the gaps in the slats, i noticed a pipe right in the middle of the would-be bar. ugh! i was completely disheartened and thought the project was impossible. luckily brandon knew we were too far in to turn back. he also realized it was just a sewer vent pipe, so no water needed to flow through the pipe and he could handle re-routing it.

our pass-through, looking somewhat like the outline of the lower 48.

me, trying not to be totally dismayed
by the pipe in the middle of our bar.

as i suspect is the case with most diy remodel projects,
this simple pass-through led from one project
to tons of other small projects.

hammering away from the kitchen side.

brandon totally impressed me with his know-how and expertise.
and his ever-growing list of "required tools."

we bought a counter top at the resource store to initiate this project.
while it was marked $10, we got it for $5!
this was the only cheap element of this project.

the upside of discovering the pipe in the middle of our wall was that we had to cut this pipe above the sink drain and found that the vent pipe was clogged. which explained why our sink was glug-glugging instead of draining properly. my dad suggested that this may have spared us from having future plumbing expenses, so it was nice to have an upside to the pipe predicament.

so gross!

our entire house was covered in this dust,
in fact, i'm still finding it!

starting to look a whole lot more like a pass-through.

we enlisted the help of heath, who was far more confident than brandon or i.
perhaps because he has done his fair-share of diy renovations.
or perhaps because it isn't his house so he cares far less than us.

i went to albuquerque for a girls' weekend with kemi and sara. when i left the pass-through looked like the photo above. i felt awful leaving brandon with the unfinished mess on his hands. however, he pressed on and finished the project while i was away. i came back to this:

i LOVE it! it opens up the house and makes both rooms feel much larger. we have a fair amount of work to do on the kitchen side of the pass-through, but we plan to replace the cabinet the sink is in, so i think we are going to live with it for a while.

the living room is coming together, so i will share photos from that soon. however, when i sat down to put this post together it turned into a total kerfuffle where i thought i lost our 8,000+ photos in our iPhoto library. i managed to resolve the problem, but i am a bit tired of dealing with the computer at the moment.

trading

2011-11-18T16:59:00.002-07:00

i am coming to realize that i have great expectations. not the classic novel, but the condition. and it is a rough one to overcome--daydreaming about just how amazing or perfect something will be doesn't always lend me to actually appreciate the reality of that something.

for instance, when i am at work i think about how awesome our dog is and totally miss him. however, when i get home and harvey obsessively follows me from room to room, or wipes his post-frisbee session slobber on our new couch, or overly enthusiastically greets friends at the door i get all scrunchy and grumpy. "why can't you be like the dog i think you ought to be?" he is bizarre and obsessive and not everyone's cup of tea, but gosh darn it i love that expressive face and those soft ears of his. why can't i dwell on that? instead i get embarrassed by the way he doesn't match up with my expectations (which are, of course, due to my lack of training, but i digress).

anyhow, i am thinking about the way that i build events up in my mind so much that they don't stand a chance of being great in comparison to my ideal, even if they are great in their own right. so i am working on that. i think that comes with this time of year and the reflection and gratitude it inspires. then on glutenfreegirl.com i found this quote:

Expectations are premature disappointments.

perhaps a bit pessimistic for some of you, but it inspired me to think about the way that my expectations lead me to be ungrateful. there is so much beauty in my life, friendships, marriage, family, even my dog, and yet i have to temper myself against the temptation of thinking of how something could be better. i want to enjoy what is, not focus on what is not.

i've been meaning to post photos of the house now that we are settled. and yet i keep waiting for the house to be clean enough, the lighting to be just right for photos, or some project to be finished first. i'll try to let go of those expectations and take at least a few photos soon. i really love our little house and i want to share it on our blog.

pop quiz

2011-10-14T16:04:00.000-06:00

so this sums up my thoughts on the world:

and also is the reason that i think it should be an official "right of passage" that every person work in food service.

two closures & a beginning

2011-10-10T16:10:00.001-06:00

we closed on our house last thursday! we are really excited to enter the domain of home-ownership, although we keep hearing how much time and money a house consumes. while we don't want to be unrealistic, we are ignoring the naysayers for a bit and enjoying our little piece of the world. we haven't done much to the place, but keep forgetting to take "before" pictures of the few little projects we have completed. we will try to get a few more photos gathered and up soon, especially after we have the internet hooked up this week.

i finished the binding on my quilt, so that bad boy is finally finished and on our bed. i even used a ladder stitch {check out that oh-so-helpful link if you ever have to do binding} so my thread is virtually invisible. how did people make entire quilts by hand? ai, that tediousness is not for me! i am having a hard time loving the quilt because all i see are my mistakes, which is sadly a little too close to my view on my own life. perhaps learning to love this quilt--mistakes and all--will help me to get over this pessimism so i can learn to "let go" a bit more in life in general.

the best news of the weekend {other than brandon finally coming home} is that my brother ross is engaged to his girlfriend, jordyn. we are over the moon excited for them and will look forward to the big day {which sounds like it is going to be in june 2013}! congratulations to two incredible people who are perfectly suited for one another!

around these parts

2011-10-04T16:36:00.000-06:00

i have been a bit of a single lady this past month+ as brandon has been gone on multiple trips for field work for his PhD. it stinks to be without him, so i hope we have a nice, quiet, stay-home kind of winter.

he was in jackson for the first three weeks of september, back for a bit, off to the middle-of-nowhere-wyoming for a few days, back for a bit, down to denver, and then off to minneapolis. in minnesota he is getting to "play" at this big fluvial lab on a controlled river where they can add sediment to see the river reactions. it sounds like a giant wet sandbox to me, but he seems to be learning a lot. he comes home saturday. for a week. then he is off again. sigh.

while brandon has been traveling around we have had a fair amount of activity around these parts:

-our close friends in laramie had baby #2.

Anjali Bliss

we are so excited for heath, emily, and bloom to have ani in the family now too! she is adorable and adaptable and snuggly. i ensured her hipster status by making her a onesie with a bird on it. that's right, you gotta put a bird on it. even on a wee babe.

-i was offered a fourth job, but turned it down. i am having a hard time managing my three jobs, so i let this one pass. i should note that i did not apply for this job, but the nursing home in town specifically created a job with me in mind and tried to hire me. so flattering, but not quite right for me now.

-we bought a house! well, we are buying a house on thursday. we started looking towards the end of the summer and saw about seven duds until we landed on this bungalow and my heart skipped a beat. let me tell you, our price range was not providing that many appealing {or safe} homes in this area so we were quite thrilled to find this gem!

brandon was out of town when i found the place so he had to put in an offer on the house site-unseen. when i called and told him i found the place and wanted to put in the offer he said, "ok, i trust you." it was a good marriage moment. and when he finally saw the house he was just as stoked about it as i was!

it has a kitchen, living room, two bedrooms and a bathroom upstairs, with beautiful hardwood floors. in the basement there is potential for two more bedrooms, a den/office, and a bathroom, plus the laundry area. we are really excited about the place and feel like we got a good deal. the house just got a new roof this weekend, so it looks a bit different than in the photo above. the covered porch, blue spruce in the front yard, back deck, and apple tree are my favorite parts about the outside. once we close i will post more interior pictures and i am sure the blog will be taken over by home improvement projects.

-i tried to go ikea denver a couple weeks back {which includes about a 3 hour drive}, but got there in time to be turned away by an announcement over the loudspeaker that they weren't admitting customers as the water main to the store had burst. so we waited about 3.5 hours for it to be fixed before giving up. brandon and i are gonna try again this saturday. hopefully we can score on some sweet swed swag!

-my dad and aunt diane came to visit for a long weekend. it was awesome to have them out here and to show my dad the new place. he and brandon actually put in a new back fence together, so they got to bond a bit. in addition, we saw my dad's cousin and 92 year old aunt, who inspires me to keep up my mischief. she is a whoot!

i look forward to a bit less chaos but am so happy about all that has been happening in the past few months.

the reframe

2011-08-26T17:22:00.001-06:00

lately i have had a lot of conversations with people about my {mis}perception of myself. particularly surround this belief:

i am shy.

yet, no one believes it. all my laramie friends challenge me on this, insisiting that shyness is impossible for me. one friend burst out laughing when i first told her i think of myself in this way. she thought i was being sarcastic, which admittedly, i often am. never-the-less, my shyness is real, despite my ability to have a conversation with a perfect stranger about just about anything.

i found this lovely little cartoon via pintrest that made me laugh. perhaps my ability to talk with strangers makes it difficult for people to believe i am shy. but i am telling you, i am incredibly introverted. just misunderstood.

we have a whole bunch going on right now, brandon especially. he defended his master's thesis yesterday {& was amazing!} & leaves for his PhD field work monday. he isn't complaining about spending the next three weeks in his kayak in jackson though--for his PhD research project he picked an awesome location & means of data collection.

hibernation preperation

2011-08-02T10:49:00.001-06:00

wow, summer has flown by so quickly & i have yet to post. somehow i thought grad school was the culprit; turns out i am just lazy. or busy. let's go with busy.

i am continuing to work at the hospital, which i am head-over-heels in love with. seriously, this is my place in the world!

i am also working at the university, as a faculty member for the division of social work. the title feels a little fraudulent as i am certain i don't know enough to be a faculty member, but apparently they thought i was qualified. i haven't been on campus much this summer due to vacation, visitors, & lots of hours at ivinson. i hope to catch up and feel a bit more competent soon.

in other news... we are working hard to buy a house. we know we are going to be here at least 4 more years so paying rent for that long seems like a waste of time & money. based on mortgage calculators we thought we could get into something soon for a reasonable monthly payment. turns out those calculators don't factor in insurance, taxes, etc. so we are further out in the process than we hoped. we are going to do a dave-ramsey-overhaul of our budget in order to squirrel away a bit more money for our down payment. hopefully there will be lots of free things going on around us in the next few months.

one of the ways we decided to save money was to disconnect our home internet service. it jumped to $60 a month so it felt ridiculous. hopefully we can put that extra money into our home savings account each month. in addition, we both have bad habits of spending way too much time on the internet in the evenings & on the weekends. we are optimistic that eliminating this distraction will result in more productivity, interaction, & time outside. it is quite embarrassing to admit how much time we spend on the internet. plus i have an iPhone now so we can check emails regularly. we may blog even less {is that possible?} in the next few months but by the time we are back on the internet at home we should be into our own house so we will have lots to blog about.

any advice from those who have venture ahead of us on this long strange trip of home buying is welcomed!

spring break, part II

2011-05-17T07:52:00.000-06:00

our trip was the maiden voyage for the van-turned-mini-rv. we had a few things "undone" but i wanted to test it out before we sunk much more time {& $} into the thing so we only did the work we needed.

i was plesantly surprised! it was really comfortable for sleeping & i didn't have the oh-my-goodness-get-this-stinky-dog-out-of-my-face-cramped-feeling i often have when we camp out of the outback. we have since finished up a few loose ends so we need to get the photos up of that transformation. overall, we are stoked about this thing!

we feel like the van needs a name, but we just can't come up with one we agree on. we are taking suggestions...

let my bed head speak for the comfort of this van! :)

justin was kind enough to ride behind me because
i was really freaked out about the reports of a cougar in the
area & since i am so slow i was the most likely cougar-bait candidate.

of course the guys found some sweet jumps.
brandon above, justin below.

we followed the guide book and trail markings, but somehow we
still managed to come out on air force land. total oops!
this was the first warning we saw so i am not sure we came
upon it backwards. we neither saw nor heard anything of interest.

pretty southwest sunset.

the rv in action!

harvey is also fond of the van because he can stand
between the two front seats & rest his head on the dash.
he was in a cast for the whole trip so this was
about as exciting as his day got.

brandon wanted a picture of them & their cars looking "hardcore."
i just don't know how hardcore a van can possibly look.

we had an awesome time with justin & it was hard to part ways. from albuquerque he headed back to texas & we went north to the four corners/mesa verde area. mesa verde is an amazing national park! it was a trek off the beaten path, but totally worth it!

the cliff dwellings were mind-blowing.

we couldn't believe how well they remained intact.

it was fascinating.

after mesa verde we booked it up to moab where we met my friend megan & brandon rode slick rock. i'll get those photos up soon. for now, off to work at one of my new jobs...

rewind: spring break, part I

2011-05-15T19:41:00.000-06:00

we had such an amazing spring break trip this year, but that was nearly two months ago & i have yet to document it. life has been busy, but it is slowing down for me as it picks up the pace for brandon. of course.

on our trip we drove down to palo duro, texas, which is outside amarillo. now, i am not fond of much of texas; austin & port aransas are the the only parts i have fond feelings for, but west texas is especially awful to me. flat & ugly. but that makes the beauty of palo duro all the more incredible. the ground falls away without warning into this beautiful canyon. justin recommended we meet there & we loved it. it was full of awesome mountain bike trails--even my favorite trail EVER.

from there we headed to new mexico. we stayed the night at a state park, but didn't do much exploring. we did feast on justin's amazing jalapeno dip & enjoyed (cold) showers. after that we drove on to albuquerque. a friend from the hospital recommended a couple things to do in the area since they recently moved from there to laramie. one of those things was ride the tram to the top of sandia peak. it was incredible! we had wonderful views of the valley and the mountain-top was beautiful. plus we had a great lunch at the summit. by far one of the best "touristy" things i have done in my life. i took a ton of photos on the gondola ride, in part to ignore my minor discomfort with heights.

rock totem

view of albuquerque & beyond

so beautiful

brandon was about two steps ahead of the tram operator in
explaining the geologic features.

i can't believe i got brandon & justin to act out the
titanic scene for me! glad i captured it!

stone house at the tippy-top of the peak, built by the CC

headed down.

passing the other tram on its way up.

barely a breeze. (yeah right.)

view of the lights of albuquerque from our
camp spot outside of town.

more pictures to come....

recap

2011-05-03T10:27:00.000-06:00

the defense has been over for a couple of weeks, but i still don't feel "done" with grad school. it took about two hours for the knot in my stomach to loosen after my defense meeting. i passed! {whew!} i had a few corrections that took longer than i would have liked but they made my findings more significant. i will work on getting my thesis converted to a journal article & submit that this summer with hopes of getting published.

i finished my practicum at the hospital this last week by attending the national kidney foundation clinical meeting/conference in las vegas. despite my disdain for the sin city that should not exist in the middle of the desert, i traveled there for the second time in seven months. it was a great conference & confirmed my interest in nephrology social work, both with patients on dialysis & awaiting transplant. i am looking into a few jobs in the field & hope to have good news on that front soon.

i do have a job now though. i got hired on PRN {translation: "per request as needed" or on-call} at the hospital. i am really excited about this opportunity! i got the job without even interviewing, although brandon thinks i had a four month interview with my internship. i will cover for three people at the hospital & cancer center, filling in when they are sick or take vacation time. plus i will cover one weekend of call per month. the pay is lovely but there won't be enough work so i am on the hunt for something else. i think of this job as a foot in the door as it will place me first in line to be hired for the next social work opening.

brandon is working furiously on his thesis & should be done this summer, just in time to jump into his PhD program. we are both excited about his new advisor who is a great mentor & friend to brandon. plus his research area will be the snake river in jackson, so it won't be hard to do research in the shadow of the tetons!

he was awarded "graduate student of the year" for the geology department last week. {luckily he doesn't read the blog often to know i am bragging on him--he would be so embarrassed!} brandon shared the award with a good friend of ours that is the most diligent worker we have ever known, so it was a compliment to be considered equal with him.

as i have said in the past few posts, i will get pictures up soon. just when i think i am done with school stuff another thing comes along. like exit loan counseling, which they told us about today and must be complete by friday or we don't graduate. thanks for the advanced notice.

d-fence?

2011-04-14T14:28:00.000-06:00

tomorrow is my big "judgement" day: i have my oral defense of my thesis.

i remember being a kid talking with my friend about going to college and writing a thesis. i really don't know how we knew such things existed, but i distinctly recall declaring to her that i was going to write one. although in those days, i probably also thought i was going to be president and find a cure for cancer.

i am, of course, getting progressively more stressed out as 9AM mountain standard time approaches. if i had kept it simple and only included my committee in this meeting i don't think i would be as anxious, but i included friends and family. what was i thinking? i just keep imagining how awkward it is going to be to have brandon in the audience. give me a room full of strangers to talk to at length about oncology social work, just not the person i love and trust most in the world. ridiculous i know.

i don't have fears of failing my defense, i just have fears of blubbering in front of my husband and friends. apparently you don't get to the point of your defense if you are unlike to pass. fingers crossed.

hopefully my days of being a cheerleader will prepare me for this moment (haha) and i can just turn on a public persona of confidence and enthusiasm. i never thought i would find a way that being a cheerleader would help me through grad school, but i think this just might be the contribution! i'll try not to pull out any pom-poms or "ready? o-k"s. :)

i am optimistic that once this thesis business is behind me i can get back to the blog. i have a whole spring break trip to chronicle after all! for now, i just needed to vent and get my fears out on ~~paper~~ the internet.

graduation, round II

2011-03-04T09:09:00.001-07:00

brandon & are both going to graduate this may, which will be chaotic & fun--running from my ceremony at 8:30am to his at noon & then to my social work department party after that. sometimes i think, bah, who needs all this ceremonial stuff? asking people to sit through this boring events makes me question attending even more.

but my dad is coming out, per his demand to see us both graduate. we were shocked that anyone wanted to make the long journey here just to see us wear funny outfits & be hooded, but my dad was adamant that of course he was coming! so we are doing this whole pomp & circum-whatever bit on may 6. i don't think i will regret it afterwards, although the running around in heels on the day of may drive me a tinge batty.

i am worried it will also feel like a sham. there is no way in the current time-space continuum we occupy that brandon nor i will be done with our theses until the end of may. which means we are going to walk across the stage, get that silly little {empty} book, & have our advisors put our master's hoods over our heads knowing all-the-while that we aren't really done done. hmph.

the day of our wedding {almost 6 years ago now!!!} we found out that our friend & mentor who was officiating the ceremony may not have been current on his license. there was no turning back to find a legitimate pastor at that point, so we proceeded onwards with the ceremony & requiste form signing. we joked for a few months about our fraudulent ceremony, hoping the bureaucracy of the state of oregon wouldn't notice. we haven't heard from them since, so hopefully they haven't noticed {or it doesn't matter} because it would be awkward to have to go through that whole wedding business again.

i think participating in our graduations might feel a little like our wedding, but this time instead of just worrying it might be a fake we will know it really is just a show.

lately, lately

2011-02-20T12:27:00.003-07:00

life has felt down-right crazy lately. i love my internship placement site more & more each day, but i feel like the rest of my life is spiraling out of control with busy-ness. for the record, i can't stand that feeling. it makes me have minor breakdowns on a regular basis. i have encountered some emotionally difficult situations at the hospital that i can't post about {HIPPA regulations rule my life these days}. the situations that involve babies & kids are the hardest, but also the richest. i am so happy i love my internship & that even on the worst of days i joyfully look forward to going back to work.

school on the other hand has been a royal pain. perhaps i am just checked out & experiencing a bout of "short-timer's syndrome" but i am over it. sadly, it doesn't look like i will have my thesis done on time. i hope i can be done by the end of may. fingers crossed.

i have been sewing a bit when i can. recently i recovered our old {read: disgusting} ironing board. i don't dread ironing near as much now that it looks fancy & new. i am in a 20-somethings quilt club so i think that ironing board & i are going be be close friends as i work on my newest project.

i also recovered the boring strap on my camera with some fun fabric. i am hoping the whimsical, girly print will dissuade would-be thieves {including brandon}.

two days after we got the legitimate check from domino's to cover harvey's vet bill we had another "harvey incident". brandon took him skiing in the backcountry, which he has done regularly all winter, & the two of them collided. the impact of brandon's skis on harvey's leg resulted in a severed achilles tendon for poor harvey boy. brandon & his friends had to fashion a dog splint & stretcher so they could carry him out. apparently the evac took over 4 hours.

harvey had surgery to reattach the tendon & has to be in a full-length hard cast for 2 months. we are 3 weeks in & it is rough keeping him mellow. we got directions from the vet that said "no running, jumping, playing, or running free for minimum of 12 weeks." obviously the vet doesn't know our dog or his never-stop-playing-for-1/2-a-second personality.

in other news... we are staying in laramie! brandon accepted an offer to do his PhD in watershed resource sciences {i think that is the right name...} so we will be living in laramie for the next 3-5 years. we are both excited about staying here for the next bit as we {mostly} adore our charming little town & love the friends we have made here. the only concern we have is about me finding a job here so i don't have to commute. we have been looking at homes for sale & plan to buy next fall/winter, depending on my job situation.

i hope to be able to post more regularly, but it is hard to get around to updating this blog when i should be doing homework or working on my thesis. my favorite professor would tell me to "stop shoulding on myself" though. :)

changes in 2011

2011-01-13T16:13:00.000-07:00

last year i did my MSW internship at the VA, in the mental health department. i loved it there & have been on the lookout for openings at VA facilities across the country. it was great to understand a {huge} part of our society more & find a way to serve people who serve in the military. it was also eye-opening & humbling.

this year i am doing my final internship at the local hospital. i have wanted to work at this hospital since we moved to here & i feel fortunate to have this coveted internship position. i started this week, with a bit of anxiety & uncertainty about exactly what i would be doing there. medical social work is difficult to conceptualize & explain, yet i have been drawn to it for years.

i now know why it is difficult to understand... because the entire work day flies by in a rush, with a buzz of energy & need surrounding you at all times, while you try to problem solve everything in a patient's life that is impacted by their medical condition. essentially, our medical crises don't happen in a vacuum & the medical social worker's job {at least a portion of it} is to address the universe of issues & needs that surround admission to the hospital. health, illness, life, death, success & failure--it all happens every day in every hospital. now, i get to be part of it!

when i started the MSW program, i felt like the faculty made it their mission to dissuade my plans to work as a medical/oncology social work plans. i heard repeatedly that my goals would change as i went through the program. i feel proud to know with certainty that i wasn't wrong about my goals, despite my lack of knowledge. being in this internship placement confirms that the medical field is where i want to begin my career.

2010 in pics

2011-01-09T09:41:00.001-07:00

last night harvey got hit by a car. a dominos delivery car to be exact. right in front of our house. it was awful to watch the whole accident happen & not be able to do a single thing. somehow he managed to bounce off the car & run out of the way before being hit again. the dominos driver didn't stop after the accident, just kept right on driving. luckily the dominos manager was upset with his driver's misbehavior & insisted that we take harvey to the vet on their expense. harvey seems to be ok, although he is really stiff & we have to monitor his breathing because the x-rays showed fluid in his lungs. he now growls at the scene of the crime each time we are near the road so brandon & i are hopeful he learned his lesson. doubtful, but hopeful.

fearing the worst as we saw the whole accident play out before us, we are now especially grateful for the little guy. this gratitude inspired me to go through our 2010 photos & reminisce. it was a good year!

harvey loves to bound through the powder
whenever we go out for a ski.

a little fox that hung around our
neighborhood last winter.

one of brandon's many crazy adventures

at the pump track in austin. harvey blew us all away
that he could keep up with this guy who was riding full speed.
i wish i would have captured the next scene,
where harvey cleared that gap!

the brothers & their bikes.

at the alamo.

our mariachi band along the san antonio river walk.

harvey at the san marcos kayak park.

brandon was so excited to see the surveying station near santa fe.
our requisite tourist photo spots aren't the norm i suppose.

scrub brush in southern colorado.

the droids of colorado state parks.

great sand dunes national park.

harvey wondering why brandon would
climb 40' off the ground.

crazy wyomin' rock face.

rodney graduated with style.
just three more sibling high school
graduations to ~~survive~~ enjoy!

we got in a little kayaking.

laramie flooded.

rowan came for a lovely visit!
(his family made it too, but he was most certainly the highlight!)

we rode bikes.

we rode bikes a lot actually.

we saw our first (& second) drive-in movie with old friends.

harvey went rafting for the first time.
he is with one of his favorite ladies in the whole world, emily.

a sweet dive into the cold snake.

i started watching bloom, our friends' son,
who we now all adore.
harvey gets a little nervous when the baby is too still or quiet.

tiff came for a visit & we talked human behavior into the ground.

kemi, mia, & i enjoyed our first of
many yearly girl's weekends in vegas!

rob & becky came for a visit.

we had an awesome time hanging out & showing them
our little life here in laramie.

we rode bikes some more.

we enjoyed texas & family.

we saw the ocean!

i made it my mission to pop as many man-o-wars
as i could along the national seashore. just doing my civic duty!

brandon caught a huge fish.

he also saw an adorable pine martin.

& he skied, & skied, & skied some more.

the cure

2011-01-03T23:30:00.000-07:00

there is something difficult for me about the transition time after christmas. i get used to shopping, being on the lookout for the perfect gift, handing over my credit card, & buying, buying, buying. after christmas there are usually a few things to exchange so that keeps the trend going. then, all of the sudden, january rolls around & we should be done with the purchasing. but i just am not that good at switching off the shopping button. i had this discussion with my friend the other day & was relieved to learn that i am not alone in this buying fever.

hopefully we closed out the shopping season with a bang! we bought a new car! we have been saving up {per dave ramsey's car-buying with cash only plan} & forked over the cash for a used all wheel drive safari van. what?!? that's right people, we bought a van! we couldn't be more stoked. it is going to be modified into a mini-motorhome of sorts & will also serve as a conduit to getting brandon out of the house & into the mountains while i slave away at my internship this spring.

i swear we saw every safari van between laramie & denver yesterday. we test-drove a few, even a pimped out conversion van with creepy limo lighting. we also went to REI to exchange my far too large bike helmet, stopped by target to buy a few 75% off work-appropriate shirts for me {see internship above}, dropped off our "second" dog at his real home, & and had an awesome dinner at PF Chang's. i haven't eaten there in a long time, but it was just as delicious as ever!

take note of the snow on the road.
we haven't seen the blacktop of our road
since sometime in november.

we are gonna pull one, or maybe both,
of the back seats out.

so it was success all around, with a few important exchanges/purchases & then one big slammin' deal on a car we have been wanting. hopefully looking out at our new {to us} paid-for-in-hard-earned-cash-money van can bite the shopping bug!

little changes here & there

2010-12-29T11:28:00.001-07:00

a while back i blogged about a yard sale where we scored on a bunch of great {& random} things. one of the things we bought for 50 cents was large brass lamp. i told brandon to look past the ugly, giant shade & sassy brassy color & focus on the lines of the base. for 50 cents he was willing to "take the shot," as rob would say. we came home, cleaned her up, & immediately took the giant {2 1/2' diameter} shade to salvation army.

we spent the rest of the day wandering the isles of rattle can paint at our local shops. brandon pulled out a caterpillar yellow--caterpillar as in CAT heavy machinery, not the fuzzy little critters. i wasn't so sure, but he was certain we need more color in our house. with some hesitation i agreed.

now i LOVE it! spray painting is the easiest way to make something not-so-cool into something awesome! we found a greyish-brown shade & the lovely yellow lamp sits on top of our renovated blue end-table. they are great together! it looks better with the fabric basket my mom made us next to it, but i took this photo during advent so the basket was replaced with my little mexican nativity.

i have also done a few things in our bedroom. i have had this necklace tree for 5 years & although i like the look of it, it was tarnishing my jewelry & the tree was starting to fall over daily because the enamel wore off the base. i stopped wearing necklaces altogether just so i didn't have to deal with the carnage of it falling off the dresser. the red jewelry box was also something i loved, but the back broke & i was struggling to keep my earrings & bracelets from tangling.

with a trip to bart's, our lovely indoor flea market, i found two frames, spray painted them, & filled one with cork board & the other with window screen. now i have a great way to display {& organize} my jewelry!

the other thing i have been up to is sewing! i sewed quite a few christmas gifts this year, but forgot to take photos of them before i sent them on their merry way. those of you who received handmade gifts from me, could you please snap a photo or two for me?

anyhow, i found some amazing fabric a while back & knew i wanted to make a bolster pillow for our bed with it. we have had the red thing going for a long time in our room, but i felt like we needed a few other colors. i added black piping to the pillow & it turned out great! i got together with my friend & neighbor for a sewing night when i made it. she totally doubted it would turn out right with the piping, but we were both pleasantly surprised.

rowan dubbed this bedside lamp a "popcorn lamp"
while he was here this summer, so now i think
of him each time i turn that light off before bed.
an adorable godson is a great thing to think of as i go to sleep!

i also {finally!} made another black curtain for the second window in our room. i made the first one the week we moved in because there were no blinds on the window from our bedroom to the street. the second window opens to our sideyard & had {nasty} miniblinds. i couldn't take those gross slat blinds anymore so i made my classic twin-flat-sheet-$4-curtains. this requires i measure once, iron, & sew a straight line. it is so simple, easy, & cheap that i can't bring myself to fork over real money for real curtains. these will do for now!

we have done a few other things around here, but i don't have photos to share yet. it only took me four months to get around to taking photos of the revamped lamp!

together & alone

2010-12-26T09:30:00.004-07:00

being just us together for christmas, i was worried we would feel alone. i am sure that is a strange concept: together & alone at the same time. holidays for me are chaotic & somewhat noisy & i always have the "where do we have to be next?" concern running through the back of my mind. we didn't have any of that this year, but we certainly weren't alone.

on christmas eve we had friends over for dinner. one couple we have known for some time, but have become closer with in the last month since they had their daughter. it has been nice to spend more time with them & realize how much we have in common. laura is a nurse in the ER at the hospital where i will be doing my internship this spring, so i am counting on her for a bit of guidance. james & brandon teleski together all winter long & climb in the summer, plus they are both geology grad students. with adorable hadley now in the picture, we have fun just sitting around watching her sleep.

we also had another ski/climbing friend from the geology department over for dinner, who i didn't know too well, but had a great time hanging out with. we had lots of snacks, then a roast for dinner, egg nog, & GF apple-crisp. it was a great night! even though family is irreplaceable, good friends make the missing more bearable.

a few tries with the timer on the camera.
we had to have an annual posed photo in front of the tree, right?

brandon looking sleepy after the festivities died down.

harvey boy also looking sleepy under the tree.

one of my nativity sets. this one is from mexico &
although not breakable, it has domino-like results if you
accidently bump one of the wise men.

this picture is blurry, but thank goodness for
technology which kept us talking with family
{& texting with brothers} all day long.

my mom sent harvey a leather stuffed buffalo for his christmas gift.
he is obsessed! first thing in the morning, "where is the buffalo?"
as soon as he is back in the house, "where is the buffalo?"
of course, we call it woofie after my brother's
childhood invisible friend who was also a buffalo.

an especially fun game for harvey is showing woofie to oliver
{tiff's dog who is staying with us for a few weeks}
& then running into the other room before oliver tries to take it.
oliver is over the game, but you can imagine that harvey
will get a few more miles out of it.

brandon & i are pretty sure everyone felt bad that we weren't going to be home so they went overboard with our gifts. we felt utterly spoiled!!! we called everyone & checked to see how they liked their gifts & send our love. i didn't feel lonely, but i would have liked to see people's faces when they opened their gifts.

christmas morning was beautiful. the trees were covered in hoarfrost, the sky was clear, the foot of snow on the ground was sparkling, & the sun was shining. it was incredibly cold, but gorgeous.

after brandon made a yummy breakfast {GF pumpkin loaf}, we suited up for a ski. he insisted on going around turtle rock out at vedauwoo. this is a great place to hike & some fun mountain-biking terrain; it is NOT a good place to cross-country ski. i was pretty frustrated that we couldn't go to the groomed 20+ miles of nordic trails just down the road because "everyone else would be there" & spent the entire ski agitated. at one point i just started crying. here it was beautiful outside without a breeze on christmas morning & i am alone in the woods crying. brandon was irritated with me for being so, let's just say, "upset" & i was fed up. my skis were off most of the morning because beneath the couple of inches of snow that remained there were slabs of granite that i was certain would hurt if i feel on. we got back to the car, i told him i never wanted to ski there again, & then i regained my sanity.

after that we went to james' & laura's for christmas ham. we brought tamales & hung out for a long time, mostly watching the baby sleep again. going to bed last night we felt fortunate for a wonderful christmas, filled with a bit of extra emotion, lots of people {& critters} we love, & each other. we didn't feel alone, but we sure missed our folks & siblings.

oliver is an excellent guest. he loves to go for a
ski & come home to sleep the rest of the day away.

update on the random

2010-12-19T14:11:00.001-07:00

whenever brandon is going to be gone, i make lists of things i want to accomplish while he is away. i get a little excited about having the house to myself, eating dinner standing over the sink, sleeping in without feeling guilty, & watching movies i know he would despise. the first few days i revel in all of the above, usually adding a night out with my girlfriends & a few craft projects to the list. but by day three i realize i miss him. a lot. mostly i miss his friendship. he is an amazing husband & i am desperately in love with him, but our friendship is what i can't to do without. especially the sarcasm & inside jokes.

i know i shouldn't complain, & i feel guilty even posting this, because some people are apart from the person they love for months, even years, at a time.

he comes home tonight! i might miss sleeping in the middle of our bed, reading until the wee hours of the morning without him dramatically sighing about my nocturnal habits, & eating cheese & crackers for a meal. but at this point, that stuff seems pretty trivial.

**********************************

in other news, i think i misunderstood my spanish-only-speaking neighbor's gesture yesterday & gave her a hug. how do you recover from giving an unwelcome hug? yeah, i gave them homemade cookies wrapped up in holiday themed cellophane, but i don't know if the reciprocal gesture is a hug. so she will probably avoid me for a few weeks until this holiday hug fever passes.

**********************************

additionally, the neighbors who gave us a passive aggressive {read: irritating} letter about harvey's barking this summer stopped by. he knocked on our door & said he stopped by to tell me that my back porch light was on, that it had been on for two days, & that it was incredibly bright. "we don't have a back porch light," i said. he argued that indeed we do & that it is bothering him. again, we don't have a back porch light. at which point it dawned on me that our neighbors {see above, who only speak spanish} are the ones with the light. i told him this & he then said, "could you talk to them about it?" i stood staring for at least 30 seconds, with my mouth hanging open. in my shock & stupidity i said, "uh, if i can communicate that." he smiled sickeningly & thanked me. what was i thinking? why did i agree to deal with his junk? the absurdity of this request baffles me. so i followed his passive aggressive style & did nothing. so much for that holiday cheer i was trying to cultivate.

community

2010-12-06T09:46:00.000-07:00

we love our little piece of the "old tree" part of town. it is mostly quiet {save for the recent WyoTech admits that terrify us with their noisy engines & jacked up pick-ups} & our neighbors are polite. but we only know one household well, the rest just by name. being the somewhat shy folks that we are, we haven't hosted any block parties at our place yet, although i've been meaning to. last night seemed to change that.

we were in a bad place after receiving tragic news about losing someone we love. although the christmas tree was lit & the ornaments were sparkling, when the credits rolled for "national lampoon's christmas vacation" we sat around feeling mournful & empty. a lot of feelings of where-do-we-go-from-here & what's-the-point? i think brandon & i both knew it was going to be a painful evening as we processed this loss.

suddenly we had a knock on the door from our neighbor, who happens to be the head honcho director of wyoming public radio. he was wearing his beat-up leather jacket, with his thick round beat poet glasses, & a black beret. he handed over a stack of CDs & a few beers, telling as he settled on the couch that he was in a bad place & needed our company. he must have sensed we were too & felt called to pay us a visit while we were all in pain. although we have talked over the fence {home improvement style} we don't know each other well, so this was a surprise.

he was well on his way into drunkenness, but luckily is a pleasant drunk. he gave me strict instructions about which songs to play on each album, which were mostly bob marley and jerry garcia tunes. after a bit he invited us to his house to listen to his billie holiday vinyls. he is a talented photographer & his house is adorned with his favorite photos. after a tour of the house & his record collection {which is quite extensive} i decided to head home to make dinner, inviting him back to our place for spaghetti & meatballs. when he came over he brought two incredible photographs--taken literally off of his walls!

over dinner he grilled brandon & i on every topic imaginable: politics, children, our parents, war, religion, our thoughts on general custer, & harvey. oh how he loved harvey! it was an interesting night to say the least.

at 11PM we were exhausted & desperately wanting to head to bed. we boxed up his unfinished food & sent him on his way. collapsing into bed we both wondered if the past 5 hours were imagined. but we felt grateful that a neighbor we barely know felt comfortable to come to our house when he needed to be lifted out his sadness. his timing couldn't have been better.

grateful for good friends

2010-12-02T16:16:00.001-07:00

i am a lucky girl & i know it... i have friends spread all over this world, friends that continue to talk to me even after i move every few years & make keeping in touch a real challenge. sara {who i call by her middle name, mia} is one of the greatest friends i have & one of the most wonderful people on earth. i love the way our friendship has grown after college & over the miles.

her birthday is at the end of december & it has a tendancy to sneak up on me in the midst of the holidays. i never want her to feel forgotten, so i tend to send her gifts really early to ensure that she is loved on her special day. the only problem with my proactive gift-giving is that mia has no patience. she always opens her gifts early.

this year i found the perfect gift on etsy so i had to order it as soon as i saw it, what with etsy items being one-of-a-kind & quick to disappear. i warned her that her gift was coming early again & told her she could open it whenever she wanted on the condition that she remembered our gift on the day of her birthday. the gift came over a month before her special day & as she tells the story, she didn't even make it from her mailbox to her door before she opened it. luckily she loved it!

mia calls dandelions "wishes" so now i always think of her when i see them & often photograph them with her mind. this print was too perfect & sums up her optimistic outlook on life.

i am so grateful for a friend who reminds me to see the wishes amongst the weeds & who lives life with energy & passion. you're the best mia!

koi of my dreams

2010-11-21T16:18:00.000-07:00

for all my productivity yesterday, today has been a letdown. i woke up today feeling full-on sick. i have been mildly sick all week, but this morning kept me cooped up in the house trying to sleep it off. i hope a day of laying low & accomplishing nothing has helped me kick whatever this nasty bug was. i have to be all better for our trip!

luckily i finished my pants last night & they are all packed. {yes mom, i am packed already!} i love these pants! the pattern was a bit unclear, so there was a point where i had one large tube instead of a pair of pants. whoops! thanks goodness for seam rippers, right? i have had other simplicity patterns that have been somewhat vague, so i am thinking of avoiding that brand in the future. don't they know that if their pattern is marketed to novice sewers the must explain EVERYTHING?!?

i am so glad to have conquered my sewing machine--it haunted me each time i went in our spare room, reminding me that i wasn't smart enough to master it. take that singer!

here are a few pictures brandon took last night. (disregard the crazed sewer's disheveled appearance please!)

brandon insisted i do something "spicy" {what exactly did he mean by that?} for the second photo. not sure if this silliness was what he had in mind...

this is a close-up of the material. after the supplies {1/2 price material, pattern, elastic} these pants were still cheaper than old navy p.j.s so i am happy. it is discouraging when your handmade items end up costing more than you would pay at a store.

i have a couple of other pieces of fabric i am scheming what to do with next. after taking the sewing 101 class at mama said sew & successfully following a pattern, i am looking forward to future sewing projects.

good riddance

2010-11-20T17:43:00.000-07:00

my thesis proposal {which is hopefully the worst part of this thesis process} is out of my hands now. good riddance indeed! now my committee members get to read it with the sole purpose of stripping it of all my mistakes & naive statements until i can't remember what i was researching to begin with. so i get to look forward to that, but for now, i don't have to do anything to this document for at least two whole weeks!

my thesis topic is: how the self-efficacy {belief in one's self to accomplish a given task} of oncology social workers impacts their willingness to conduct mental health assessments & provide supportive counseling. check back after i hear from my committee members & it might be a whole different story. i hope not.

as a reward for getting over this hurdle {that my avoidance of turned into a hurdle of epic proportions} i am gonna sew myself some pajama pants. i found awesome funky koi fabric at 50% off a week ago, meticulously ironed & cut out last night, & tonight i am gonna do the fun part: sew! the plan is to have them finished in time for our trip to austin.

other than that, i just have a few pounds of apples to turn into applesauce & can, a paper to finish for one of my classes, grading of 21 undergraduate student papers, & packing my bags for our trip before monday at 6am. it's gonna be a race to the finish!

stop over

2010-11-09T10:01:00.000-07:00

rob & becky made a detour on their road trip to austin to see our little piece of life here in wyomin'. it was nice to be able to share some of our old favorites & new adventures with them. we went to vedauwoo & hiked around the crazy rocks. we were eager to see a moose, so eager i mistook some hikers tromping through the brush for one. oops!

we also spent lots of time in antique shops & each of us found a few treasures. i found a great print of a ponderosa (kind of nikki mcclure style) in a junky frame. we put it in a new frame & it looks great. plus it is a reminder of home, which is always a bonus!

on saturday we packed the four of us & the two mutts in the outback. we felt like sardines in there with the dogs breathing down our necks! but it was another beautiful day so we took our time & enjoyed the trip to rocky mountain national park. we saw one elk from a distance in the park & about fifty in a city park down in town.

the park was beautiful--definitely a place i want to visit again. most of the park was closed for the season, so brandon & i need to make plans to get there next summer. too bad dogs are not welcome in national parks. i understand the rationale, but as a dog owner it really cramps my style.

on sunday we hung around the house, brandon & rob put together a washstand papa overstreet made a few years back. i need to get pictures of the finished product--it is really cool! becky & i ran errands, went for coffee, & baked an apple pie. it was nice to lay low with them. we even used our projector and $1-yard-sale-score-projection-screen to watch a movie!

they took off yesterday after a tour of campus. it was nice that it wasn't "goodbye" since we will see them in austin in a few weeks for thanksgiving. after they left brandon & snuck in the last bike ride of the season, which was awesome. i had a wreck that left me hurting pretty bad, but it still felt good to get out before the snow hit. which it did this morning. we are in a total winter wonderland at the moment!

cookbook poetry

2010-11-01T14:39:00.001-06:00

we are on a detox/cleanse diet this week, so naturally all i can think about is the food i can't have. instead of smoothies & soup, i want au gratin celery root & potatoes.

a while back, on the advice of my dear friend tiffany, i requested alice waters' "the art of simple food" from the library. my love affair with this cookbook began immediately! i love that she writes out her recipes in a way that seems more like poetry than cooking instructions & how she is mindful of combining things that are in season. for the most part, every recipe seems easy to convert to gluten-free & includes lots of cream & butter! :)

i received an email notice that this book is due back soon. i want to protest & keep it forever! i could forgo every other cookbook (except for gluten-free girl, i confess) & happily cook from this book for the rest of my days. it is going to be a sad day when i have to drop it back in the heavy, cold, metal book drop, but at least i know it will take a few oil splatters from my kitchen with it.

on tonight's detox menu: broccoli & arugula soup. tomorrow: still no coffee or 1/2 & 1/2. what were we thinking?

*** update
brandon quit the cleanse. the broccoli & arugula soup was awesome & he quit before dinner, so i had this yummy {& warm!} dinner all to myself.

you win some, you lose some

2010-10-22T09:30:00.004-06:00

well we didn't buy the truck last week like we planned. brandon specifically asked about the condition of the clutch & the guy said it was fine. turns out that was not true. we were annoyed that we drove 2.5 hours based on inaccurate information. in addition, they had not replaced the timing belt ever so it felt like a ticking time bomb. we offered them way below asking price {honestly, hoping they would say "no", but knowing we could work it out if they accepted}. they didn't accept & we got in the car feeling annoyed with the way sales work. honesty people, have you heard of it? i suppose they needed the money, but it left us with a yucky feeling.

we redeemed the weekend by getting together with tiffany and having scrumptious pizza. we decided to stay the night at her place. for whatever reason we brought enough food for harvey to stay the night, but failed to bring extra clothes or p.j.s for us. always thinking about him first... staying the night gave us a chance to cruise denver auto-row and hit up lots in ft. collins on the way back. we didn't find anything, but got our annual fill of stereotypical used-car salespeople.

to further redeem the weekend, we found a yardsale where everything was half off. it was the biggest yard sale score i have had, on a sunday to boot!

we got a set of spice jars, an herb garden kit, an old-school heavy-weight wrench, an ugly lamp & two lampshades {future post on that redo to come}, & a spring-form pan. our grand total: $3! the pan is in perfect shape & is costs over $50 new. {yes, i googled it!} the spice jars not only make my cupboard look more unified, they also prevent bags of herbs from the co-op from falling down on my head each time i open the door. the random grey stick thing was in my box of jars--i guess it is for bathtub plumbing. hopefully we don't have to use it, right?

in other news, i entered a contest to win a year of free udi's gluten-free bread {which is the BEST gluten-free food ever!}. help me win by voting for my sandwich, the "AvoPestGobbler". just go to this link & click "thumbs up". the sandwhich is totally inspired by my mom & aunt kris who made similar sandwiches at grandma's the day after she cooked a turkey. i used to think "yuck, cranberry and turkey" & now i think "yum, yum, yumm!"

i've been doing all kinds of crafty projects in an effort to avoid homework. i need to take pictures and post them, but i hear a 10 page paper due tomorrow relentlessly beaconing me. it might be a bit before i get the photos up, but rest assured that the ugly sassy-brassy lamp above has crossed over into coolness.

big brother

2010-10-14T21:13:00.001-06:00

my dad is a little creeped out by the power of google maps, referring to it as "big brother". i suppose it has something to do with feeling like his privacy could be violated. but he didn't grow up in a generation of narcissistic facebook status updates, so i can understand his desire to preserve some sense of privacy.

recently google pulled off some pretty cool tricks for brandon though...

we have been in the market for a truck & finally saved up enough cash {per dave ramsey's advice} to buy it outright. brandon found a pickup he is interested in on craigslist but we have had difficulty getting in touch with the person due to phone number issues. we were beginning to doubt the whole situation & fearing we were getting the run-around on a non-existent truck.

cue google: brandon entered the phone number we had into google, got an address connected to the number, & then went to "street view" where he could see the truck we are trying to buy in the driveway!

we were feeling all excited about the magic of google, until we realized how easy it is to track down someone's home address, vehicle type, & property layout without even leaving the couch. let's just hope no one is looking for us with ill intentions, eh? so yeah, now i understand why that "big brother" gives my dad the heebie-jeebies.

if all goes according to plan, we will head down to denver tomorrow, cash in hand, to add another vehicle to our car insurance policy. a bonus of the trip is that we get to visit tiffany in denver!

inaugural girls' weekend: vegas style

2010-10-05T19:55:00.003-06:00

kemi, sara {mia}, & i have been trying to start a tradition of taking an annual get-away together for some time. we finally made it happen this past weekend & went to vegas! what a perfect place to kick of a tradition of fun, shopping, food, & laughs.

we went dancing EVERY night & my feet have still not recovered. i am not sure they will ever forgive me for forcing them into 3" heels & then proceeding to dance my way through vegas. i learned i don't much care for dancing to house music, that every club plays the "new york" & "all the single ladies" at least once per night, & that getting ready to go out is half the fun.

on the last night we found ourselves at an irish pub with a live band. turns out dancing to irish music involves a lot of jumping, elbow swinging, & beer drinking. this trifecta resulted in a pint of beer being poured down my back & tired legs. it was by far my favorite place though!

we also saw a circ de soleil show. wow! i can't wait to see another one. it was breathtaking & totally worth the money!

mia found the biggest slot machine i have ever seen! we didn't gamble much {i didn't at all, actually}, but put our money towards other things, like clothes & coffee. luckily we didn't have to buy our own drinks since they are so expensive there! ahh, the benefits of being a girl in vegas...

this was our hotel, the luxor. one wall of our room was slanted glass, so that was sort of strange. the lobby boasted four starbucks which kept us running on less than four hours of sleep per night. i even stayed up long enough to catch a SUNRISE...

i'm already scheming where to plan our get-away for next year!

if i had a million dollars, if i had a million dollars...

2010-09-27T20:46:00.000-06:00

...i would totally fly out to d.c. for the rally to restore sanity. a weekend with jon stewart, seeing if a call-to-reasonableness is a possibility? sounds amazing! with a message of: "take it down a notch america"? yeah, i think i could get behind that.

but then, after all that middle-ground seeking, i think i would have to head on over to the march to keep fear alive.

perhaps i would waffle between the two? going back & forth, feeling invigorated in the same way you do when you go from the hot tub to the swimming pool. yep, if i had a million dollars, i would totally be d.c. bound the last weekend in october. {oh, & if i didn't have class that weekend.}

lively decorating

2010-08-31T10:15:00.002-06:00

candace, an old friend who i don't get to see often enough, & her adorable daughter came for an overnight yesterday. we went to lunch & then headed out to bart's, which is an awesome flea market in town. we had a blustery afternoon, so spending an hour in the indoor flea market/antique store was perfect. my favorite section is the plant booth {to which candace rolled her eyes in disgust}. last winter i got a creeping charlie plant for our bathroom and almost bought a string of pearls, but didn't feel like i should buy both. i later regretted that and went back, but there were no more pearls left. yesterday they had some so i didn't hesitate!

some jade & the string of pearls to give us some
more greenery & life in the house.

my mom has had these plants before, so i will think of her each
time i water this guy.

turns out now is the time to buy gardening supplies. the pot
that the jade is in was originally $10 (not too bad for a
decorative pot, right?). i thought i was getting a deal on it for $5,
but it rang up for only $2.50! gotta love
needing/buying things out of season!

i also found this yellow enamel bread pan at the
flea market. i wish i would have chosen the larger one so it
would fit more fruit, but i am not totally sure that i am
going to dedicate it to that purpose.
although i haven't decided how to use it, i sure do LOVE it!

Garden Party

we have ears of corn!
brandon's hopefulness paid off.

the broccoli is finally coming around. supposedly it
does ok into the cold fall. lets hope!
i love the feel of this photo. who knew
broccoli could be such a fabulous subject?

i had tomato dreams last night, willing them to turn red!

our only sizable squash. i was too zealous & planted my seeds too
close together, resulting in humid conditions & ultimately,
powdery mildew. next time i will trust the
seeds &give them the space they need.
this might be the only squash we will be able to
eat this year. bummer!

our little forest of peppers

an antique, a few plants in colorful pots, & an expanding garden--all of these things make me happy to have a little more growth & life in our house.

wild rumpus

2010-08-26T09:24:00.002-06:00

*disclaimer*: this is an all-dog, anthropomorphizing post. ignore if: 1) dogs drive you nuts, 2) specifically, harvey drives you nuts, &/or 3) you think i've lost my mind for posting so many pictures of dogs. no offense will be taken.

having grandma & grandpa last night was wonderful! we had a quiet evening with a nice dinner. {i was terrified to cook for stan, but he didn't complain about our uber healthy salad or the quinoa. at least he didn't complain to me!}

most of the evening centered around getting their scottie dog, fergie, & harvey to play well together. despite her pint size stature, she held her quite own well. all the while maintaining her scottie dog dignity, of course.

harvey tried to lure her off the couch to play with this move...

...to no avail.

then he tried to wrestle on the couch. as you can see, fergie was having none of it.

we also realized late last night that it was harvey's birthday. he is two & sadly none of this puppy energy is showing signs of disipating. {in case you were wondering, no special treats or gifts were bestowed upon him for his bithday. i don't take my anthropomorphizing that far!}

the grandparents are coming, the grandparents are coming

2010-08-25T16:43:00.000-06:00

i have never had a grandparent stay at my house before, but that record is about to be broken: stan and delores arrive in an hour or so! brandon is out of town (yet again!) so i am on my own to host tonight, but i am excited to have them in our home. they are also bringing their adorable dog fergie, so harvey will have a bit of entertainment as well.

in other news: school is rough. classes haven't even started yet and i already feel behind. it seems we have over 1,000 pages to read before class starts friday. how did this happen? i just hope this isn't indicative of the semester... i hate starting out defeated and behind. at least i just have one more year of this academia business. i suppose i should savor the student lifestyle as i am sure the year will race by.

remixology

2010-08-15T13:19:00.001-06:00

it seems that blogs these days are for showcasing how you salvage & remix old furniture to be more hip, more your own. being the late-to-catch-the-boat person that i am, i finally got around to refinishing a side-table/night-stand that i was never too fond of. almost all of our furniture {except for our dining room table & bookshelf} have been hand-me-downs or gifted to us. we are grateful for the generosity of our friends & family, but most of our furniture just seems so random & not, well, us.

the side-table in its original state. boring & bleh to those handles.
it was functional though, as it fit our printer, housed our small dvd collection,
& hid our printer supplies, but was beat-up & ugly.

i trusted the advice of young house love & put some good ol' elbow
grease into making this table new to us.

i wish i would have gone with the blue on the lower half of the
paint chip, but i was being cautious since this was my first project.
the paint name: "totally scientific". who has the job of
naming paint colors anyway? they are so random!

there's that elbow grease i was talking about.
i did every step of this project, with no help from brandon.
{except for when he showed me that i was using the sander wrong.
it would have been a miserable project if he didn't correct me.}

then...
this is what this corner of the room used to look like.
we love the central oregon painting, but it didn't really fit there.
i'll admit, we just hung it on an existing nail when we moved in.
isn't that design laziness at its worst?

& now...
this is the corner with the new blue table, a candle from ross & jordyn,
an awesome fabric basket my mom made for us, photos of our
godson rowan & my sister hogan, & a cheap DYI
knock-off of {expensive!} crate & barrel prints.
we have two more prints on the other side of the room,
above a matching nook.

seriously, i love these prints! i also love this corner of
the living room so much more!
i'm not terribly fond of the tall{& ugly} lamp in the corner
that was left behind by the previous renter,
but it works for now. i foresee a future project for a hanging light...

to keep the light blue from looking too much like it belonged in a nursery,
i roughed up the edges. the scuffs & scratches make it look totally better!
plus, it keeps me from worrying about it getting dinged or scratched...
it will only add to the character right?

so there you have it: my first furniture refinishing project. all the rest of my furniture better watch out, because i am on a mission!

postage stamp possibilities

2010-08-07T11:14:00.001-06:00

we have a little postage stamp of a garden, which i have posted about before. actually, it is more envelope-shaped. but a garden it most definitely resembles. things are actually growing and we've been eating them from time to time. here are a few photos of the recent harvest.

the carrot came up by mistake when i was pulling weeds, but tasted EXACTLY like a carrot! who would have thought?

our kale and lettuce, which we have been eating like crazy. my mom is always so happy when we sit down to dinner and she can say, "the lettuce is from the garden!" i never fully appreciated what that meant and used to think "gross!" but now, i get it! i can totally taste how much better, fresher, and safer this food that i grew actually is. way to go mom for continuing to grow food for our family, even when all of us kids were mistakenly thinking store-bought was better.

in our family we have a christmas tradition of "find the pickle ornament on the christmas tree". this summer we have a new tradition, called "where's the pepper?"--sort of like "where's waldo". if you squint just enough you can see we have three peppers growing strong!

tassels, our corn has tassels!

these pictures aren't about the garden, but about the other theme of our summer: mountain biking! brandon finished his 70 mile race in about 8 hours. can you imagine being on your bike for that long?!? no thanks. that is why i volunteered, although i ended up riding about 25 miles myself because i got lost on the way to my volunteer post. typical. i also fell in the mud multiple times, so my shoes have been living on the back deck. even simple green couldn't revive them.

i was so impressed with brandon though. he did amazing and is even thinking about doing it again next year. he wasn't sore the next day at all, just a little tired.

what we've been up to:

2010-07-18T20:03:00.002-06:00

b: preparing his presentation for the ecology conference in august.
l: writing a literature review for my thesis.

b: riding his bike in the name of "training" for his 70 mile bike ride
l: grooming our garden, hoping we can eat more than lettuce before the summer turns to winter. {last year that was sept. 15.}

b: gearing up for a week in yellowstone, doing river research commissioned by the navy.
l: gearing up for a two-day whirlwind tour of our square state, stopping along the way to interview people who provide services to people who are homeless. this is for job #2, where i am a mentor to a mcnair scholar.

b: working on all four of our bikes--something always seems to be in disrepair these days. i guess they are just getting more use than normal.
l: refinishing some furniture {pictures to come when it is complete}.

both of us:

wishing we had more time away from the computer, where we could hike, bike, eat, read, & sleep.
enjoying our delicious CSA fruits. these apricots straight from the tree are incredible.
looking forward to having our godson & his lovely family here in our house soon. what excellent motivation to work hard now so we can enjoy every moment they are here!

celebrating year V {in photos}

2010-07-12T09:51:00.001-06:00

for our anniversary dinner we went to this funny, although delicious, restaurant in lander that i had been to once before, called "cowfish". their menu makes me laugh. no trying to hide the fact you are eating animals, i guess.

harvey boy was slightly less than amused to be in the car yet again. luckily he demonstrates his annoyance with dramatic sighs, dirty looks, & long naps... not destruction of nearby shoes & suitcases. he really is a great road-trip dog, other than his annoying hourly habit of biting/snapping at every white car that drives by. only the white ones. apparently our dog is prejudiced.

after dinner we hiked {if you can call it that, as we were both wearing flip flops} to the poppo agie falls. the river was still flooding, but had come down considerably from the week before when the national guard was called in to protect houses & businesses. town looked a little worse for the wear & we spotted a few trailer houses outside of town that were not in their original location.

two things i can say about being married five years:

1) we still love each other like crazy

2) we still can't take a decent self-portrait

this was our lovely anniversary sunset as we headed back down from the hike. pretty amazing.

after camping for free in the city park {best idea ever!}, we headed west. we stayed a night in dubois. i was surprised by how amazing the landscape is east of dubois--a mini version of the bandlands. i don't think it gets much attention though, because dubois has become a stopover on the way to grand teton or yellowstone. i didn't mind, as it meant we had more to explore on our own. we went into the fitzpatrick wilderness for a day hike & only saw one other group.

nothing quite like wilderness to remind you how big the world around us really is. plus it is nice to be reminded that there are places on this globe that aren't inhabited. that comforts me.

there is also nothing else quite like the tetons. we forgot just how captivating they are until we came over the pass & caught our first glimpse of them in two years. still as breathtaking as ever.

we spent a day on the snake river, at high water. apparently i kayak with my eyes closed. that explains a lot.

brandon's new camera is waterproof so he was enjoying taking photos on the river.

just right of the center of this photo you can see my little orange helmet bobbing over the waves. this is the last rapid before the take-out, always a bittersweet moment for me.

the absarokas. i love the way that name rolls of my tongue. the mountain range isn't too bad either.

grateful

2010-07-03T13:23:00.002-06:00

i am so grateful to have a girlfriend to go ride mountain bikes with. riding with brandon is awesome & pushes me, but riding with a friend is a whole different thing. having emily in town for the summer has been a blast... it is going to be hard to say good-bye come august.

i am also grateful that the clouds are moving in this afternoon. i have studying that just wasn't going to happen if it stayed sunny out all day. grey afternoons are just the thing for thesis prep!

we had an awesome 5 year anniversary trip, complete with heaps of photos. for now, i am going to exercise self-control & choose to do reading for my thesis before i upload the pictures to our blog. admittedly, it is far more rewarding & enjoyable to edit & comment on photos, but i can't handle the guilt that is oozing out of the stack of articles i need to read.

lastly, i am grateful for skilled doctors who took care of one of the best ladies in the world {becky, arguably the best MIL ever!}. surgery went well & hopefully her recovery is just as smooth.

looking forward

2010-07-01T18:36:00.003-06:00

i recall talking with friends about adopting children even when i was a child. it has always been something i planned to do & luckily brandon resonated with that desire.

recently our reasons & hopes to adopt have grown deeper & greater. we talk about it frequently & it seems like a natural, & solidified, part of our plan for the life we share. i can't say exactly what our "future family" will look like, but i am certain that adoption is in the path we have ahead.

i had a talk with a professor on campus today, who recently adopted her son. our conversation confirmed & re-ignited my desire to adopt a child. although it is many years off, i look forward to the day that our family grows from the outside in.

hope grows

2010-06-18T19:57:00.001-06:00

we have a very small garden in our backyard. i am getting a little bit of teasing from my friends about how "hopeful" i am. what i hear when they say this is actually how crazy they think i am. grow vegetables in wyoming, at 7500 ft., where the growing season is approximately 90 days? well now that i think about, it does sound crazy. but i am nothing if not crazy, right?

i must confess, i am proud of the hope i have for my postage stamp garden. i really believe we are going to grow things outside & eventually eat them. i have had an indoor herb garden many times, but an outside garden seems so much more ambitious. & also a lot more likely to fail, i admit. but i am going to keep on hoping that some good soil, a little water, & sunshine will work magic!

i am so hopeful in fact, that i just joined veggietrader. i am preparing for a plethora of squash & kale, which i hope to trade for other things we didn't plant, like cucumbers or green beans. even though it is unlikely, i am holding out hope that by september i have had-it-up-to-here with recipes involving straighneck squash and zucchini.

in the meantime, it is eggs in a nest for dinner tonight.

play-boating pelicans

2010-06-02T13:06:00.002-06:00

last week the whitewater play park in casper came in pretty big time. brandon was thrilled to have an opportunity to kayak big water that rarely occurs. {apparently they are working on a dam upriver so all the water is free-flowing, music to his ears!}

we headed north in the afternoon & since play-boating is not appealing to me i decided to go for a big long run while he boated. i ran hard & fast because a big storm was coming in. when i came back brandon was just putting on the water. {why is that going for a run always feels like a long exercise session until you compare running-time to real-time? twenty minutes of running feels like so much, but 20 minutes of anything else is no big deal.}

anyhow, when i came back from my run i noticed what i thought was a white garbage bag recirculating in the surf. then i noticed this strange movement and briefly thought a child was in a plastic bag trying to extend their arm to swim. hmmm, the mind makes strange sense of what it doesn't understand. ultimately i realized it was a pelican, stuck on the wave. i sprinted to the car to get my camera & snapped a few shots.

the bird doesn't look so good and clearly couldn't get off the wave on his own. brandon is adamant that he saved the bird's life, so don't get too offended by him using his paddle to pry the pelican off the wave. i think brandon was just fed up with not being able to surf the wave due to the bird hogging it up.

pretty crazy, huh? there was another kayaker there who is an animal biologist & he said he has never seen anything like it.

whatever may be

2010-05-29T20:54:00.003-06:00

today we went for a hike with a friend from costa rica, max. unfortunately we waited until late in the afternoon, when the dark clouds started rolling in, bringing their friends "thunder" & "lightening" along. we didn't make it far up the trail before better judgment sank in & forced us to turn back. when we were about 100 feet from the car the sky opened up with pea-sized hail {ouch!}. never-the-less, it was fun to explore an area that is new to me. {brandon was there last fall with doug & liz}

pretty little flowers that required a magnifying glass {or zoom lens} to see them.

: : :

harvey has been a real pain lately. i mean a real pain. he has taken to obeying only when he feels like & barking at every leaf that has the nerve to skitter across our sidewalk. it is just a phase, but i am seriously considering bringing in the dog whisperer. anything would be better than me lately, being the antithesis of a whisperer.

i recently found a blog about the massive dog rescue in eastern oregon that happened in december. over 150 dogs were left to fend for themselves in the snowy winter, with little food or shelter. it simultaneously broke my heart {that people could be so cruel} & made me proud of the goodness of the people of the PNW {that all 150 dogs have been adopted or fostered in just 5 months!}. bonus, a social worker was the first to report the case to animal control--way to go social workers!

a lot of the puppies looked like harvey used to, which made me get all kinds of sentimental. so despite my annoyance, here are a few of the faces of harvey:

he sneaks up on the couch when we are out of the house & during the night.

shaking off the sleepy face. {please disregard our horribly dirty rug--we had a dog rodeo just moments before and hair was EVERYWHERE! still, gross rug there overstreets!}

he is a pro at giving me the stink-eye. apparently i annoy him equally.

check out that crocodile tear. poor guy! so emo.

one day we will have children & i will look back laughing at the fact i posted so much about our dog. oh well. btw, if any of you want an almost-2-year-old australian shepherd/maniac mix let me know...

predictable

2010-05-19T21:51:00.001-06:00

i came across a book at barnes and noble recently, stuff white people like. i had heard of the blog before and laughed at it a few times, but the book freaked me out. of the first 10 pages i liked 8 of the things! ugh, i felt so predictable. so i recently checked out the whole list, which consists of 139 items. once tallied, i only like about 26% of the things on the list, so that had me feeling a bit better.

each of the items listed have lengthy posts explaining the things white people adore, but the BEST explanation by far is the camping post. all credit due to stuff white people like, this is awesome:

If you find yourself trapped in the middle of the woods without electricity, running water, or a car you would likely describe that situation as a “nightmare” or “a worse case scenario like after plane crash or something.” White people refer to it as “camping.”

When white people begin talking to you about camping they will do their best to tell you that it’s very easy and it allows them to escape the pressures and troubles of the urban lifestyle for a more natural, simplified, relaxing time. Nothing could be further from the truth.

In theory camping should be a very inexpensive activity since you are literally sleeping on the ground. But as with everything in white culture, the more simple it appears the more expensive it actually is.

Camping is a multi-day, multi-step, potentially lethal activity that will cost you a large amount of both time and money. Unless you are in some sort of position where you absolutely need the friendship of a white person, you should avoid camping at all costs.

The first stage of camping always involves a trip to an outdoor equipment store like REI (or in Canada, Mountain Equipment Co-Op). These stores are well known for their abundance of white customers and their extensive inventory of things for white people to buy and only use once. If you are ever tricked into going to one of these stores, you can make white people like you by saying things like “man, this Kayak is only $1200, if I use it 35 times I’ve already saved money over renting.” Note: do not actually buy the kayak.

Next, white people will then take this new equipment and load it into an SUV or Subaru Outback with a Thule or Yakima Roof Rack. Then they will drive for an extended period of time to a national park or campsite where they will pay an entrance fee and begin their journey. It is worth noting that white people are unaware of the irony of using a gas burning car to bring them closer to nature and it is not recommended that you point this out. It will ruin their weekend.

Once in the camp area, white people will walk around for a while, set up a tent, have a horrible night of sleep, walk around some more. Then get in the car and go home. This, of course, is a best case scenario. Worst case scenarios include: getting lost, poisoned, killed by an animal, and encountering an RV. Of these outcomes, the latter is seen by white people as the worst since it involves an encounter with the wrong kind of white people.

Conversely, any camping trip that ends in death at the hands of nature or requires the use of valuable government resources for a rescue is seen as relatively positive in white culture. This is because both situations might eventually lead to a book deal or documentary film about the experience.

Ultimately the best way to escape a camping trip with white people is to say that you have allergies. Since white people and their children are allergic to almost everything, they will understand and ask no further questions. You should not say something like “looking at history, the instances of my people encountering white people in the woods have not worked out very well for us.”

Note: this works for all races!

put your attention

2010-05-18T17:03:00.003-06:00

a friend of mine always says, "put your attention" instead of pay attention. i love this phrase; it makes more sense to me and reminds me of her each time i use it.

the past few years i have put a lot of attention towards politics. being one to get easily engrossed in things, i have found myself in a lot of heated conversations where i felt i must adamantly defend or explain my liberal ideals. sometimes my impulsiveness gets the best of me and i say things that are upsetting to people who matter a lot to me. at the end of the day it is just politics and those people are people i love. but i go to bed with a heavy heart, knowing i caused the rift in my life with my wagging tongue. and then all my attention for the next few days it put towards questioning and doubt, about who i have become--a person that doesn't always let love rule in my heart.

this past week it went a little further, my political obsession crept in between brandon and i. for the most part we are agreeable about politics {or else he is fearful to say otherwise, which is more terrifying to me than disagreeing!}, but this week it came out the he was less-than-thrilled {great euphemism, eh?} about some recent events where i made my political ideology known. mostly he was upset because how i expressed myself wasn't respectful, to someone he and i both have heaps of respect for. it got a bit worse, but this blog isn't titled "airing our dirty laundry" so i won't divulge those details. i did, however, go to bed each night with a progressively heavier heart.

i came across a great quote this afternoon that put it all in perspective for me. their rule [the radio] is: no silence ever. when anything happens the commentator has to speak without a moment's pause for gathering wisdom. falsehood and inanity are preferable to silence... the talkers are rising above the thinkers*. perhaps this is the lesson i need to learn: to avoid failing to gather wisdom before talking. and to put my attention to love, not devisiveness.

{none of this comes from a place of feeling the need to be quiet or complacent. i will continue to speak out on issues that matter, but i hope to think before speaking and to let love be the guiding force, not politics. sorry, this feminist liberal isn't going anywhere soon.}

*barbara kingsolver, the lucuna.

he's going to want some milk to go with it...

2010-05-13T14:18:00.000-06:00

although it doesn't feel like summer here--and won't until july, i am told--i am enjoying my "summer break". i've got a constant list running in the back of my mind about all the projects i want to do this summer and delighting in the fact that no alarm clock has to be set.

today it hit me hard that procrastinating does not pay off. i always do this... start vacuuming, realize that i should really dust first, then think i should finish all the dishes in the sink so i can use it for mopping once i finish vacuuming, then realize that i really need to get dinner in the crockpot resulting in more dishes in the sink. three hours later all i have are unfinished projects surrounding me. oh, and a feeling of defeat. when it comes to accomplishing anything around the house, i feel like the mouse in "if you give a mouse a cookie"--one thing leads to another and at the end of the day all i have is a giant mess on my hands.

this equation of procrastination + attention deficit = burnout. and i don't even have kids to make it more difficult. in my defense, i do have a dog who likes to bite at and "herd" the vacuum. but that is one thing i accomplished today: we made progress with harvey not being so darn mad at the vacuum. little pat on the back for me. or him really.

the one thing i am staying on top of is my thesis. i am bound and determined not to let this get out of hand. i have a 3" binder full-to-the-gills of journal articles i need to read, in alphabetical order, with a checklist of each article. of the 62 articles i have printed so far, i have read 6. so it is a start and a pace i am going to keep on. slow and steady is the name of this game.

i am thinking i should make some curtains for the living room, which means a trip to the fabric store, where i might something to cover this computer chair with...

road trippin'

2010-05-10T12:40:00.001-06:00

we took off on thursday, desperate to get out of the snow and cold. it was getting to us in a major way, so we went on a quest for something that felt like summer. we didn't exactly find summer, but we found cool places in colorado and got to meet up with justin, which totally made up for the lack of summer weather.

we put some good miles on the car, which was loaded down with bikes, kayaks, and way too much camping gear. the kayaks really served as a rudder for the wind to throw the car around on the interstate, and in the end, we didn't even use them. oh well. another time.

here is a map of our ridiculous meandering journey. we only doubled-back on our tracks once!

this place that we camped was windy, windy, windy. all the picnic tables had these sun/wind shades, but to me they looked like an army of drones or something.

we met up with justin, who drove through the night from texas. since he didn't sleep and we didn't get restful sleep due to wind and a rocky campsite, we all needed coffee and breakfast. after that we headed into the mountains, to an awesome town of salida, which we can add to the list of towns brandon and i could live in. they have a kayak park in town, incredible mountain biking all around, and a fairly light winter considering their elevation and location in the middle of the rockies.

we spent the afternoon mountain biking on some awesome trails above town. they got pretty intense towards the end (i.e., steep, sandy, and not well-banked into the hillside). it was a great afternoon though--a nice way to combat sitting in a car all day. we found an awesome camping spot along side a creek and had a nice, cold night.

the next day we drove somewhat aimlessly through colorado, unsure of where we wanted to go and what we wanted to do. finding forest service access proved to be difficult and took us up a sketchy road. justin's rented minivan did awesome, but with rain in the forecast, we didn't want to get ourselves stuck on the 4WD road.

this peak is mount lindsey, even spelled right.

sunday morning, justin set back for home and we headed for great sand dunes national park. it was impressive, but windy. wind + sand wasn't exactly soothing, so we didn't last long. just enough for a picnic lunch, a splash in the creek, and a few photos.

although we planned to camp a few more nights, i got kind of burnt out on living out of the car. plus the place we planned to camp produced ticks within 10 minutes of our arrival. i really didn't want to relive that nightmare with harvey. also the river was low, so the kayak park brandon wanted to hit just didn't give him enough motivation to suit up for a "mediocre" wave.

we drove the remaining 3.5 hours home to wake up in our own bed, hopefully tick free. we made a big detour to check out breckenridge and had awesome food at a little burrito shop. good fuel for our ambitious drive home. but waking up here, without aching backs from sleeping on the ground and having access to real coffee and cream, totally made the groggy drive worth it.

awesome day

2010-04-06T20:36:00.000-06:00

i had a great day at the VA today! i have enjoyed it so far, but i have been longing to have the experience of conducting the mental health intake and assessment process on my own. today, that happened. it went well and i feel much more confident having that under my belt. no longer do i have to agonize over my first therapy session. it was rewarding and affirming.

one of our class assignments recently was to do a cultural competency assessment of the agencies where we have our internships. in my department i noticed some important questions were missing from the forms we use to make mental health diagnoses--we never asked about what cultural groups people identify with or how their values/beliefs influence their ideas about mental health treatment.

the second part of this assignment was to conduct an "intervention" that would respond to the problems we identified. i dreaded this part. i feared it would feel like i was judging the department. i didn't know exactly how to introduce this intervention in a natural, comfortable way. but today, my opportunity snuck up on me in a staff meeting. how convenient! i presented my intervention, got a round of support, and the staff decided to include it in a report about ways our department is improving patient care. wohoo!

if only the mass amounts of homework awaiting me would pan out so nicely.

pranky mcprankster

2010-04-04T22:01:00.000-06:00

back in january i got a speeding ticket (ugh!). through a series of unfortunate events, i ended up dropping the payment in the courthouse box after 5PM the night of my court date, which was a friday of a three-day weekend. i was freaking out about being late on my payment because the back of the citation said a warrant would be issued for my arrest if i failed to appear or to pay before the assigned date. that weekend, i was followed on four separate occasions by police officers. i swore they were out to get me and that i was headed for the slammer!

i kept checking our bank account for a week, waiting to see if the check had been cashed. after my nerves were nearly fried i called the courthouse to see if i was in trouble or not. the woman assured me that she had my check and that my citation was "cleared". according to her, my payment was on time. i didn't protest.

this past thursday i came home from campus to quickly change into my running clothes, only to find a yellow notice in our pile of mail that said i had failed to pay my fine and/or appear for the appointed court date; therefore a warrant had been issued. i panicked! i immediately called the number listed and spoke with a kind woman. i explained my situation and we went through all the possibilities, including my maiden name, which i haven't used in almost five years.

then i noticed that there were two address labels on the backside of the note card. she instructed me to peel them back to see if the card was addressed to someone else. i pulled the first label back: blank. under the second label the card read our address, but someone else's name. i read the name to her and immediately she told me they did have a warrant for that person. she assured me that my name was clear, and we ended our conversation utterly confused.

about that time brandon walked in. i launched into my crazy story and told him i called the court house. about that time he stopped me to say, "APRIL FOOLS". what?!? apparently the card arrived at our house that afternoon and he couldn't pass up the chance to prank me with a legitimate fear on this tricky day. how could i be mad? it was too perfect of a prank not to pull!

in five years of marriage brandon has never pulled a prank on me. not even a jump out from behind the closet door kind of prank. honestly, i have been a little disappointed. i expected that would be a big part of being married, seeing who could get the other's goat. but this one, it makes up for all the missed opportunities.

it gets worse

2010-03-05T12:59:00.002-07:00

harvey wouldn't leave his bandage alone so he now has to face the ultimate dog humiliation: the cone of shame. i don't think i will make him wear it outside, just so he doesn't have to face the humiliation, the way the dogs on UP did.

i think i went from being his favorite person in the world to the most evil. i feel bad, but it is some good entertainment, especially when he tries to bite at it.

a few days of the cone should give that foot time to come down from its current swollen state so we can super-glue it back together.

new use for old socks

2010-03-03T20:53:00.001-07:00

harvey got hurt this past week. while playing soccer in a friend's yard we noticed profuse amounts of blood in the snow. turns out harvey cut one of his hind foot pads open. it was a straight cut, but went deep. we had a long walk home once we realized the injury, but of course, the fact that he was leaving a trail of blood didn't phase him.

i tried to get some neosporin on there, but it didn't last long. then i put a sock over it. the sock didn't last long. hmmm.

brandon came home and determined that his wilderness first responder training qualified him to mend up our dog. we didn't get photos of bandage #1. by the time i got home from work tonight he had chewed both ends of the bandage off.

so tonight brandon set to cleaning out the wound and re-bandaging it. he did a much better job this time around. and we got pictures!

as you can tell, harvey is thrilled to be constantly told "leave it" to the obnoxious bandage+sock combo.

it doesn't help that he now has no traction on that foot and we have hardwood floors throughout.

perhaps his favorite part of the whole ordeal is that each time he has to go outside we have to put a plastic bag over his leg. yeah, based on the looks he gives me, i am sure that is his favorite part.

doubt and certainty

2010-02-21T13:44:00.000-07:00

i can't speak for brandon on matters of faith. i can only speak for me and at times i don't even feel so confident about that. either way, doubt has been the theme for our house the past few years. i see it with my friends too, especially the ones that went to christian university. perhaps it has to do with leaving that community and facing the real world? for me it feels like it has to do a lot more with the way nothing can be proven. not even gravity or the age of the earth, and especially not heavenly beings.

yet, i have a lot more faith in things that are scientifically "supported" than most of what i learned in church. i can't help myself but question how and why the traditions of christianity have continued, despite the fact that a lot of those things are oppressive.

i also get frustrated by the way people intervene with god. i suppose i could say that about most things that start out pure, be it god or nature: it seems like we people just go and muddy up the waters with our "needs" and "knowledge". anyhow, i just doubt, doubt, doubt this whole religion thing.

god? jesus? yeah, i still believe. would i jump up and say i am a christian? i don't think i would. but then i am not too certain about that either.

this quote gives me comfort:

doubt is uncomfortable; certainty is ridiculous. -voltaire

some of the blog readers will be bothered by these confessions, but honesty seems more important right now. for some reason i feel compelled to tell you, "have faith" but that seems like a bizarre comfort to offer.

picture book

2010-02-18T13:33:00.005-07:00

these photos are overdue, months overdue! unfortunately rodney couldn't be there for this photo shot, or even to see hogan and wyatt at christmas. we still had a great time watching the kids enjoy christmas and seeing papa have most of his family together was wonderful. i can't believe how tall my little brother and sister get each time i see them!

wyatt usually makes a funny face in at least one of our family photos. i suppose it wouldn't be our annual christmas photo session if he was smiling in each picture.

these photos are far more recent...

our resident neighborhood fox. that is right folks, we have a fox that has been spending some quality time in "downtown" laramie.

brandon caught him last weekend on the playground at the school half a block from our house. he took harvey for a little frisbee action and found this guy there fighting off some crows. brandon suspects that people around here must feed him because he was altogether too comfortable around humans. we have been seeing so many fox in these parts lately.

this is the lovely amaryllis that i planted when we got back from our december road trip. it bloomed just in time for valentine's day and is making our house feel much more vibrant.

other than that, we've been skiing a bit and mostly keeping our noses glued to computers or books. i was so wrong about this "free time" that i anticipated having as a student. yeah right!

going hippie

2010-02-15T19:14:00.001-07:00

we just joined a CSA, grant farms. i am really excited for the fruit that is coming our way this summer and suddenly concerned with the weather and growing season for northern colorado. initially i figured we would buy into the veggie shares, but then i realized that there are more vegetables on my "enemy list" than i would like admit. fruit though? i've never met a fruit i didn't like!

i can't wait for the summer to roll in with cherries, round out with apricots and nectarines, and finish off with oodles of apples. oh, and berries scattered all in between.

it came with a hefty price tag, at least that is what i thought originally. then i realized that it feels that way because you pay it all up front. plus we are going to have all kinds of delicious fruits that i would otherwise pass up at the farmers' markets. all it took to convince brandon was one word: pies!

as for eating our veggies, we can buy things we will actually eat at the farmers' market. i just don't want to deal with the pressure of beets staring back at me every week. fruit pressure seems much more bearable.

happy valentine's day yo!

2010-02-12T14:22:00.001-07:00

i have always loved valentine's day--not for the sweetheart sentiments and romantic expectations, but because this is a holiday based almost entirely on greeting cards and chocolate: two of my favorite things. some people balk that it is just a way to force us to buy things from hallmark. let's face it though, we don't do enough handwritten greeting card giving these days so if a couple days a year we celebrate our love through clever cards, i think we are all the better off for it. besides, in some relationships, this might be the only day a year when romantic acts are done. luckily this is far from the case in my marriage.

the other thing about this holiday that the social worker in me loves it that all school children (who are allowed to celebrate valentine's day) are required to give equal treatment to their classmates. sure, i always saved the best cards to give to my bestest friend or to the cute boy in class, but the mandate to distribute your superficial greeting-card-love across the board seems unique to this holiday.

also, pink and red look good together. that color combo soothes me in these grey winter days. so valentine's day, i am glad you come around in the dead of winter to brighten our moods, bearing delicious sweets, and forcing us to share the love.

trip photos

2010-01-04T09:38:00.003-07:00

we are home and rested from a lot of time on the road. our trip was wonderful and varied. these first photos from the beach are mid-trip photos. i have a lot more to upload from the early part of the trip and a few from Christmas. soon...

in the meantime, laura and i had a wonderful time in the city. on friday that we were there we had a wonderful 60 degree day and we met up with a friend of hers from berkley for lunch. from there we headed to the marin headlands to bask in the sunshine and enjoy the pebble beach. it was my favorite point in our time in the bay area! i saw what i insisted was a dolphin out in the bay, but emily was certain was actually a shark. we didn't stick around long enough to see what the sea creature was, but hopefully the surfers managed to avoid it regardless.

laura's friend emily was so much fun--full of energy and immediately comfortable to be around. she was an exceptional tour guide, even showing laura new things in her "home". over lunch she talked about a trip she went on a few years back and how she was going to do it again. according to laura my eyes lit up hearing about it. i certainly felt inspired and couldn't wait to tell brandon all about it. so now we are beginning to make plans for a post graduation adventure. as the trip solidifies and the time draws near, we will share more. at this point, it is all just exciting talk and a thing to stow some money away for each month.

the beach was beautiful and surprisingly empty for such a rare, clear day.

who knew the city could be so close to the country? it was gorgeous!

a lot happened between the beach photos and these, but i have yet to get those uploaded. we had a great time in oregon with our families and were royally spoiled over Christmas. it was wonderful to have special moments with everyone at home and enjoy catching up, even if it felt rushed at times.

one of my many wonderful gifts was a new zoom lens from brandon. i am pretty certain he was tired of hearing me say, "ah! my lens is so lame. i just can't zoom at all!!!" anyhow, the lens he got me is awesome! we took it out yesterday on a x-country ski adventure and had fun playing with it for the first time.

as harvey is usually my favorite subject, i had a good time catching him in action, bounding through the snow. he reminds me of his fox and coyote cousins when he leaps around like this.

on our drive home from oregon, we had to go back to northern california to collect data for brandon's field work. we spent the day on the shasta river measuring 300 rocks from the riverbed. i was glad my job was just to stand on the shore and record the numbers he called out to me.

after that was done we headed to reno for the night. on this trip we hit both las vegas and reno and we only gambled once, per aunt kris' advice. on our way out of town we stopped at the "nugget", which was apparently my grandma's favorite place to go in reno/sparks. i could totally envision her there and got a little teary-eyed thinking about her. we had breakfast at the casino and then i sat down at the wheel of fortune game and promptly lost $1. i knew i couldn't be in grandma's old stomping grounds and not play aunt kris' favorite game--i would always think "what if i could have won a million dollars?". but apparently i don't have the few family gambling luck!

the epic journey begins

2009-12-11T22:53:00.001-07:00

we leave bright and early tomorrow morning for our big road trip. we are heeding the call to go west! most of the next three days will be spent in the car, but we have a few exciting points along the way. we are going to stay one night in las vegas, which should be interesting at the very least. we wanted to go to a show, like circ de soleil or blue man, but we were clueless about how expensive those can be. i am sure we will be sufficiently entertained by the lights of vegas and the (minimum) 70 degree temperature increase the area promises.

then we spend a week in the bay area with laura and kevin. in reality, i will spend the week with them and brandon will spend his week with geology folks at the AGU conference. he keeps worrying that i am going to be bored, but i know that is impossible in the company of laura!

turns out harvey is the most expensive part of our trip. (is anyone surprised by this? no, didn't think so.) finding a place in vegas that was eager to have a dog to stay the night caused the hotel price to rise quite a bit. and then in cali we are going to board him, luckily with people that seem normal and not too out of touch with the animal-human division of privileges. however, bay area boarding rates are out of this world. if anyone is at a juncture in their life where they don't know what to do with themselves, it appears that a lucrative option would be to open a boarding facility in san fran that charges slightly less than $50/night. you would be overwhelmed by business!

the joys of laundry day

2009-12-07T10:38:00.002-07:00

we love our little house, we really do. the one downfall: no washer and dryer. (okay, so there are two downfalls as there is also no dishwasher, but we are dishwashing pros so we get by). anyhow... the lack of w/d leads us to the laundromat. i have noticed that i used to go more frequently, about every week and a half. lately, i have been pushing it to more like three weeks (or until we just don't have any more socks or undies left). yesterday we both realized we had nothing left in the way of undergarments so i loaded our bins and headed out the door with pockets full of quarters.

i learned a bit while i was there:

1) going to the laundromat on sunday is an awful idea. everyone else is there and the football game is on so it is far from quiet.

2) talking on your cell phone might not be the best idea, as everyone can hear everything you are saying (see below).

3) folding 7 loads of laundry by yourself is a daunting task.

4) if you are going to own fitted sheets, you should really make sure you have a partner there to help you fold them.

5) the key to surviving without a w/d is to own multiple sets of sheets. this way you have that glorious clean-sheet-sleep, without having to go the laundromat once a week.

the laundromat shows limited discrimination (aside from the "haves" and the "have nots", i suppose), so there is always someone entertaining to watch or a phone conversation you are forced to overhear. this weekend in particular there was a young man who received a call from his mother, who accused him of getting a DUI. the conversation went like this:

no mom, i don't have a DUI.... no, i have never had one... what are you talking about?... do you really want to go there? do you want me to print out my criminal record?... just listen to me, i have never had a DUI!...

kind of makes me wonder what his little brother told his parents! however, it was nice to know that the person i am sharing laundry-folding tables with does not drive intoxicated. his conversation got funnier though:

so mom, i woke up this morning and the dog was acting to weird. stumbling around in circles and looking really confused. i put him outside and he just kept falling down... yeah, so i called the vet and she said it was an extra $100 for weekend emergency visits.... anyhow, i took him in and $350 later she told me he was drunk!

so maybe the dog is to blame for the DUI?

late arrival

2009-12-04T10:42:00.004-07:00

yesterday my brother alex turned 17. it has been so much fun to see him find what he is naturally talented at. he is brilliant, so school comes easily to him. he has always been pretty good at video games, but it wasn't that exciting to see him spending his days inside.

this summer we traded him kayak lessons with current for helping us at a big 4th of july event. i wasn't sure if he would like boating, but he and his friend sam both took to it naturally. they were fearless and willing to do things in their boats that still scare me.

it has been great to see him work through challenges with kayaking and come home with war stories. each time we talk on the phone now he has some exciting boat adventure to tell me about. i am so proud of him for the effort he puts into this passion and can't wait to see where paddling takes him.

he is also a wonderfully thoughtful brother. he always thanks me, gives me a hug, and tells me he loves me whenever the opportunity comes up.

he has always been the one making smoothie messes in the kitchen, staying up late reading an exciting book, and "just looking" at breakable things.

spending time along side him in a kayak on the mckenzie last summer was one of my favorite memories. my face hurt from grinning so much and i am sure everyone on the trip got tired of hearing about how proud i was of him.

happy birthday bubby!

we love you!

the human icicle

2009-12-04T10:10:00.002-07:00

it has been cold here lately. i mean really cold. for instance, since tuesday we haven't seen a temperature in the double digits. mostly we have been seeing negative numbers on the thermometer.

i had to take a rushed shower yesterday and blow dry my hair quickly. i didn't have enough time to make it totally dry, but figured it was close enough. i rode my bike to campus (slightly terrifying given the snowy/icy roads, but way quicker and since i was late i had no choice). as i walked up to the glass door of my office building, i noticed in the reflection that my hair was white. i felt it and it was frozen. around the back of my head i had two clumps of frozen icicle hair. i was a little scared to touch it for fear that it would all break off. the thought of me being a human icicle kept me laughing most of the morning. guess i am going to have to plan ahead in the morning to make sure my hair is fully dry.

my grandma used to always freak out if we went outside with wet hair (even in july), insisting that we were going to catch pneumonia. i can only imagine if she saw my frozen hair!

today is the last day that my assignments are due and therefore what i consider my last day of school! we have a break for over a month, which i am excited about. i will keep working at the VA next week, but no school work to deal with when i get home!

we are driving to the bay area around the 13th for a geology conference brandon is presenting at. we get to stay with my lovely friend laura and her boyfriend kevin. i am excited to spend the week in san fran and the other cool areas around there. mostly, i am excited for good food and laughs with laura!

we have to board harvey (because laura has cats and is in a place that isn't doggy friendly). theoretically it is no big deal to board him, but these bay area dog owners are nuts and spoil their pooches. this means the boarding places all offer a bone on the dogs' pillows, a blanket turn-down, and puppy pedicures. at the tune of $60 a day!!! all i want is somewhere that will feed him twice a day, give him a place out of the rain, and not make me fear that he will loose his eyes (like a place in laramie is known for). sometimes simplicity is just too much to ask for.

redemption

2009-11-29T21:48:00.000-07:00

this has been the week of mistaken purchases. first, i bought chicken, thinking i was getting an awesome deal on a bunch of poultry i could freeze for future use. however, the good price was because it required minor surgery to remove the skin and bones. my price savvy euphoria faded quickly as i set up a butcher shop in our kitchen. i guess the experience made me realize how convenient those boneless, skinless, individually-wrapped chicken cutlets really are. now i know.

i also bought some wine in a rush (same shopping trip--it was a flop). i came home to relax after a tough week and savor my wine... bleh! i didn't check the label and ended up with a type of wine that is super sweet and so not my style. i scoured the internet in search of some way to redeem my mistake. and this is what we treated ourselves to tonight:

mmm, delicious roasted pears, braised in butter, honey, and sweet wine.

we saw julie and julia this weekend, so perhaps that influenced by creation (and my reckless use of butter!). regardless of the inspiration, i am glad that the wine didn't go to waste.

hiking on zicam

2009-11-29T19:28:00.002-07:00

brandon and i have both been fighting off colds, but the sore throat stage took over yesterday and this morning we woke up feeling awful. we thought maybe a bit of fresh, 20 degree air would do the trick so we went out for a hike. it is that challenging time of year where there is too much snow on the ground to mountain bike but not enough to ski. so we settled on a hike in a new location.

we had a nice hike, but kept it short because we were both worn out quickly. harvey was appalled that we got back in the car so soon, but we don't have his limitless energy.

on the drive out, we spotted these fellas. at first i thought, "that is a huge horse." then i noticed horns and didn't know what to think. it took a couple of seconds before moose finally registered. they were really dark and furry, all ready for winter, i suppose.

we had a great thanksgiving with candace, kim, richard, and adorable miss scarlett. scarlett wasn't too trusting of brandon and would stop dancing or singing if he was looking her way. they are teaching her early that boys are trouble! it was nice to be with people from oregon when home feels so far away.

VAMC OMG!

2009-11-23T19:38:00.000-07:00

i started my training at the veterans hospital today. i am going to be working as a social worker in the mental health unit. for the next two days i am just training (which thus far equates to filling out 50 pages of forms and taking online modules about computer security and diversity).

for a rural area, the hospital does a lot and actually serves a lot of people in "VISN region 19". we learned a lot about the (negative) history of the VA and how the whole system changed for the better in 1996.

everyone in my social work program is required to do a field practicum placement, 16 hours per week, usually unpaid. i landed this sweet gig for my internship and i am getting paid! wohoo!

my one fear? that my vocabulary is going to be taken over by acronyms (see title).

the front is the original building--with an floor added on and a labyrinth of new wings extending out. still a cool building to look at though!

practicing the holiday

2009-11-18T10:49:00.000-07:00

last week was brutal (see post below), but i realized that i have to shake off the badness and see the good. after all, thanksgiving is just around the corner. shouldn't i get into the practice of being grateful before the turkey is on the table?

1) thanks to my mom for helping us with our car towing fee. you are the best!

2) thanks to my friend sadie for baking brandon and i a gluten-free peanut butter pie. delish and totally out of the blue. brandon even said, "now, why did she bake us a pie?" just because she is awesome!

3) thanks to the shirleys for inviting us to be part of their family for thanksgiving. this will be the first thanksgiving holiday we won't be with our clan, so thinking about just the two of us was strange. now we get to see that beautiful scarlett girl and spend the day with wonderful people.

4) i only have one weekend of class left! a lot of assignments and projects, but still, only two more days of sitting in the classroom.

5) i start at the VA hospital on monday, an opportunity i am so excited for. i know it is going to change and challenge me.

6) we are being better dog owners and harvey is, in turn, being a better dog.

this list is mostly for me, a way to chronicle the blessings in my life and remind me that there is a lot of good around me.

my regular view

2009-11-14T21:56:00.000-07:00

too bad this isn't a photo of harvey, but pretty dang close!

i'm not even superstitious

2009-11-13T22:18:00.000-07:00

what a week this has been...

1) my flight back from oregon was delayed by nearly four hours. i missed my connecting flight to denver, my bags didn't make it on the plane i was switched to, and i got an earful about how teen mothers are turning this country into a socialist nation by my neighbor on the plane. oh yeah, and the shuttle company i coordinated two months prior to drive me from DIA to home had no record of my confirmation number or name. a miserable travel day to say the least.

2) i spent this afternoon writing a paper. through a strange and convoluted chain of events the way i saved the paper was as a temporary internet file. i spent hours trying to find the finished copy and eventually called campus IT, only to be told that this was one of the ways to royal mess up on a PC and that there was no way to recover my paper. so i rewrote it. all six pages.

3) we went to a geology party tonight. when we arrived there was 8" of snow on the ground and i had to ride in the back (again, through a convoluted chain of events), so when we arrived i didn't get out on the passenger side in order to notice that we parked in front of an unplowed driveway. two hours later when we went to our car to drive home, our car wasn't there. a couple of people from the party said they saw a police officer out their earlier and a tow truck just took it away 10 minutes before. so we walked 15 blocks home with the crock pot of soup we took to the party, in 8" of snow. and we can't get the car until 9 tomorrow morning, at the earliest.

4) we got home from our unanticipated walk to find that harvey had jumped up onto the kitchen counter, retrieved a full loaf of my gluten-free bread and ate half of it on the living room floor.

i am not even superstitious, but i really hate friday the 13th.

the scariest thing we know...

2009-10-31T19:55:00.000-06:00

a dog!

halloween unknowns

2009-10-31T13:43:00.001-06:00

i had grand visions of wearing a super-cute flapper costume of sara's for halloween. trouble was it required a slip of some sort underneath and all roads coming and going from laramie have been closed for days. of course laramie had nothing helpful to offer so i was at a loss for a costume, with a geology department halloween party only days away.

brandon was asking me one night this week what i thought he could be with all the hair he currently has (i classify his current style as "hippy mullet"). all the shaggy hair made me realize he would be a perfect jermaine from flight of the conchords (one of our favorite shows, thanks to logan & alyssa). this didn't solve my costume dilemma, but at least he was set.

when we went to the salvation army to find some sort of jermaine-style coat, we came across a PERFECT denim shirt. after a bit of photo research, we are pretty certain that jermaine actually wears the same shirt in various episodes. a few hangers down from the levi-dream-shirt, we found the ultimate bret animal sweatshirt. it was settled, brandon was jermaine and i was going to be bret.

once brandon had the shirt and glasses, all that remained was the sideburns and he was a spitting image of the kiwi.

granted i could have gone as mel, the new zealand band's only fan, but that outfit was too frumpy and not as funny. besides, the sweatshirt was too good to pass up...

i struggled with what to do with my hair, so i opted for the headband after this photo:

all-in-all, brandon's outfit was perfect and he resembled jermaine in an uncanny way. i wasn't quite as perfect at bret, but despite the obvious factors working against me (long hair, being a woman, etc.) we pulled off the duo pretty well.

sadly, we were about 3 for 20 in terms of people knowing who we were. i think we might be a little ahead of the times here in laramie, but next halloween there are going to brets and jermaines on every corner, vying to be as cool as us.

winter time, and the living is easy

2009-10-09T22:29:00.000-06:00

harvey and i had a date with a friend and her dog tonight.. harvey decided to lap up her glass of red wine however so i am waiting for the hiccups to commence, dumbo style. he managed to indulge in a few sips without spilling a drop if you can believe it!

after we left the house we quickly realized that winter has set in on us. oh boy. not sure i am ready for the snow just yet. harvey doesn't care, provided that the frisbee is still in action.

brandon is gone yet again this week, therefore a few tests of my single-hood have ensued. first obstacle being a low bike tire. i went to fix it and whoa, ripped the metal end off. i searched through the leaves (prior to the snow falling), but couldn't find it. guess i am gonna need a new tube. luckily logan took it upon himself a number of years ago to train me how to change a tube. i am gonna have to put those skills to the test tomorrow, although with all the snow maybe riding my bike isn't the best idea.

at this point, i think i have substantial evidence to correlate brandon leaving with snow falling. it just always happens that way. must be his warm personality keeping the cold at bay!

the debate rests (maybe)

2009-10-07T17:25:00.000-06:00

since we got harvey (almost a year ago!) we have speculated about his "other half". we knew mom was australian shepherd, but dad, he could have been anything. so we have googled various mixes of australian shepherd and not really been sure of anything. at first we all thought blue heeler, but then his legs got too long. lots of people have suggested lab, but i haven't thought that could be because he is the WORST (i mean this in terms of all the dogs of history kind of worst) swimmer. he just claws at the water hoping for it to harden and mimicks drowning. this makes me think no lab blood possible.

anyhow, the other night through a random internet bunny trail i came across the wikipedia site about australian kelpies. i let out a little gasp, because i felt like i finally cracked the code! the pictures showed the exact same body type, tail, head shape, and coat. the coloring didn't match up perfectly, but we know he got the blue merle color from his shepherd blood so we could account for that.

then i went on a quest for photos of australian shepherd-kelpie mixes. and tonight i uncovered the golden photo:

no more harvey, the ambiguous breed! we have got him pegged!

this one totally looks like him in action:

and lastly, if only we could teach him to do this! i am sure if there were enough sheep around, he would do it just to be a nuisance.

shrub like rasta

2009-10-05T18:06:00.000-06:00

last friday it was 32 degrees and sunny; in brandon's mind, this equates to the perfect day for mountain biking. he got back in bed after checking the weather and as soon as i cracked my eyes open he began negotiating about what it would take for me to be willing to go riding. it sounded somewhat miserable, but he was obviously desperate for time outside on his bike. i gave in and we were off into the cold, crisp air.

when we got to the trailhead there were cows grazing everywhere, a species harvey had not yet been introduced to. the hair on his back immediately stood on end and he let out a few scary, big dog barks. the cows were unfazed by this little "hank the cow dog" look-a-like and went back to their food. occasionally on our ride we would come across a lone cow and harvey would dutifully protect us until we were at a safe distance (i.e., make a total jerk of himself barking up a storm while the cow took no notice of either harvey or us).

i had an intense fear brewing that i would come around the corner at full-speed and plow into one of the cows. what an obituary that would be: death by cow! therefore, i rode a little tentatively until the last segment when i let my fears go and plowed on ahead through the aspens.

harvey and i were racing through the single-track and came around the corner to another deadly scenario: an ice-covered bridge. i slammed on my breaks before i hit it and slid off the trail into the bushes. these are the reasons you ride tentatively when it is freezing outside!

it turned out to be a great ride and left all three of us with the wonderful feeling of proper exhaustion for the remainder of the day. probably the last ride before the snow hits hard, as it is supposed to do this week.

we noticed this little plant growing in the back a couple of days ago. ever since, all i can think about when i see it is rasta! so i revised the buffalo soldier lyrics to say, "shrub like rasta" and i find that song is stuck in my head all the time. silly song for a silly plant, i suppose.

good answer

2009-10-01T09:27:00.001-06:00

last night i made a dinner i had been thinking about for a couple of weeks. i was imagining a sort of mushroom stroganoff and thought the night of our "big storm" would be a great time to make this winter meal.

sadly, the meal turned out more like mushroom and onion gravy over pasta. blech! i reverted back to my childhood ways and spent more time picking out the onions that didn't get fully sautéed than i did eating.

i was so disappointed that it didn't turn out well. i have been on a good role with cooking lately, creating things from scratch that have turned out surprisingly well; therefore, it was due time to have a total flop. never-the-less, i still felt like a kitchen failure.

brandon ate his meal and when i apologized half-way through for how repulsive it was, he said, "it's okay. thanks for trying something new."

i was floored by how spot on his response was. it was just what i needed to hear! i knew the food was gross so i didn't need to hear the words from his mouth and feel worse. his answer made me feel so validated and appreciated that i was okay with my failure.

good answer there brandon!

another september celebration

2009-09-28T10:38:00.000-06:00

matt, my mom's husband and our step-dad, celebrates his birthday today. i have a great photo of him from our thanksgiving feast last year but i can't find it anywhere on our computer. luckily my mom has a framed copy of it, but it is driving me nuts that i can't blog with the photo of matt in his element in the kitchen.

he is a wonderful guy who serves people in quiet, thoughtful ways: cooking incredible gourmet feasts, washing dishes so my mom and i can catch up on the couch, taking care of harvey with a minutes notice, making refreshing beverages appear in your hand before you even knew you wanted one, and helping people re-roof their houses (so that isn't literally quiet, but he does things like this without expecting recognition).

he also makes my mom really happy, tells ridiculous and corny jokes that make us all cringe before we chuckle, loves his three dogs in a way that would make the "dog whisperer" proud, and looks out for the four of us kids (including brandon) in practical ways. he always responds to my cooking question texts immediately, knowing that i am in the midst of a kitchen crisis, and without fail says, "thanks for calling" at the end of each phone conversation, even when he is the one who calls.

being a step-dad is certainly not easy and rarely offers much recognition, but he does his primary job excellently: he loves our mom and we are so grateful for that. though we don't say it as often as we should, we love him too.

we hope you have the happiest of birthdays and know that you are appreciated in all little and big ways!

the culprit

2009-09-22T12:39:00.000-06:00

here it is folks: the screw! if life could stop testing my mental capacity and strength in adversity while brandon is away, that would be great. haven't i passed that test already?

maybe all these things are just to make me miss brandon and the practical ways he shows me love. i do, i do!

regarding the pumpkin: now all the stores are out of real pumpkins too! i was going to go way above and beyond and boil/puree my own, but i can't even do that. guess psyllium husks are going to have to work! i am telling you, there is something shady going on with pumpkins, at least here in the square state of wyoming!

**4:05pm: here is what i found on the pumpkin shortage: bad weather means not enough ripe pumpkins for canning and libby's only cans once a year so they don't have enough quality gourds to work with at this time. some flimsy promises to see the pumpkin next week, but i'm not believing it.

canine companion

2009-09-22T09:09:00.001-06:00

brandon is off counting fish and measuring gravel, so that leaves harvey boy and i to our own devices. we got home about 11:30pm on sunday from taking brandon to the airport and went straight to bed. we woke up the next morning to find: SNOW!

my brain did not register this and tried to think of alternative explanations, but sure enough, it was snow. in september. agh!

i realized after i woke up that i had to be at a meeting in 12 minutes so i flew out the door and peddled through the pelting snow to campus. i made it to the meeting on time and tried to catch my breath.

then i came home and immediately took harvey for a walk. he was acting a little weird, but he tends to be bizarre so i didn't think too much of it. when we got home i realized why he was worried: he had eaten the majority of the bathroom trash! the mess he left behind wasn't too big, but i can't imagine his gut feels good.

after that i was washing the dishes and dropped a glass--of course it shattered all over the kitchen floor! harvey left it alone (sensing, i am sure, that he was already on thin ice so he better listen to my "sit! stay!" commands.) i am so glad we don't have kids because i am still finding glass shards, even though i thoroughly cleaned.

(side-note: i haven't broken that many dishes, but the few times that i have have been when brandon is out of town. i kinda want to research that strange phenomenon!)

after that incident, i decided to brave the whirling snow flakes and set out to find some canned pumpkin, the magic doggie laxative. i went to three stores, finding empty shelves where the pumpkin should be, until finally i asked. according to the annoyed grocery store clerk at albertsons, no one in wyoming will have canned pumpkin. for who knows how long. they have "temporarily discontinued it". what? who discontinues canned pumpkin in september, with halloween parties, thanksgiving feasts, and even christmas dinner that all necessitate pumpkin pie coming soon? i am confused and sensing that there is something major brewing in terms of an e. coli pumpkin contamination scandal.

so it was an eventful monday. i am hoping that all the silly little slips are over with for the week, although i fear i may have to take harvey to the vet if he doesn't process some of this garbage soon. oh boy!

**10:15am: just now i went to the car to go run some errands and heard weird noises as soon as a i started driving. i turned off the radio and heater, but the noise persisted. oh yes people, i had a massively flat tire! we are talking driving on rims, so luckily i realized it before i drove more than 200 feet. i am just glad it didn't happen while i was along the freeway on sunday night.

ode to a great

2009-09-14T23:01:00.000-06:00

tomorrow my brother officially closes the chapter on being a kid. 18 is a grey area, but 19, no that is clearly man status. and what a man he has become!

when people ask me what i did with the last year i mostly reply with, "i shared life with my family." to be in central oregon was one of the best decisions we have made, especially because it meant we got to spend time with ross in his senior year.

i love this photo of the two of us. even when things are hard in his life, he still loves his big sister unconditionally.

we also got the chance to go bouldering with ross a few times, mostly last fall when harvey was little and adorable. it is so fun to see ross problem solve and work out his routes.

(the shoes that are in the background of this photo were a constant source of frustration that day, as harvey kept sneaking up the rock to nab them and would then take off running with his loot. oh harvey boy!)
i love the brotherly concern he has for brandon in this photo. what a guy!

quite appropriately he was named mr. congeniality in the mr. shs pagent. i was so glad the judges saw in him what all of us do: he is a compassionate person who wants to make sure that others are taken care of and happy.

this spring ross, his friend christian, harvey, and i went on a camping trip. (this was the trip harvey got really sick on.) it was crazy and not at all what any of us expected in terms of weather and camping locations, but we have many treasured stories and jokes. he was so patient with harvey and his incessant need to be near ross at all time and he was considerate of me not wanting to stand in the rain and fish. thank goodness for jordyn and her wonderful influence on his life. :)

Happy Birthday Rossco!

We love you!

reminder: 11 more days

2009-09-12T22:07:00.000-06:00

today was my first day of full-on weekend classes. strange that we have "been in school" for three weeks and only now really starting? yes. strange that my schedule is exclusively on the weekends? also, yes. strange that i sit in the same basement classroom from 8am-5pm saturdays and sundays? again, yes.

it is, for lack of a better word, a strange program, set up for those who live outside of laramie and/or those who work full-time to be able to attend. and indeed, there are people who work full time and commute in for our weekends. i can barely handle working 10 hours a week for the university and living 7 blocks from campus, so i shake my head in disbelief at the reality the working commuter students face.

it was a draining day and i still have much reading to do before i pick up for another day tomorrow. but i really like my classmates, i know i am in the right field, and for the most part what we are studying is interesting.

however, i will fall asleep tonight with the glorious reminder that i only have 11 more days of these classes and this schedule this semester. that feels strange indeed!

(note: i am not wishing the days away, rather just reminding myself that i can handle this craziness.)

new friends in new places

2009-09-07T15:31:00.000-06:00

this weekend we cancelled our plans to go to jackson because of the insanely long drive and the fact that i am going to have to drive 2/3 of the same drive this week. with a last minute call to our ft. collins friends doug and liz we had alternate plans and began packing for a camping trip in the colorado mountains. there were 10 people and 3 pooches total and all of us had a great time. we found a wonderful campsite and enjoyed running from the ever-shifting campfire smoke, eating fire-cooked meals, and swapping stories. doug and liz have superb friends so it was easy to have fun.

we went on one short hike on saturday afternoon, realizing about 1 mile in that we were started from the wrong trailhead and that we were a good 8 walking miles from the lakes we were hoping to reach. oh well, my legs and lungs were ok with the modified hike we took instead.

the next day we set out on an epic hike to "bag some 13ers" as the colorado folk put it. there is this strange drive to conquer mountains in this state and although 13ers (peaks that are =/> 13,000 ft) aren't as cool as 14ers, you still get some recognition for hiking those. i'm certain they are all a strain on my respiratory system! anyhow, foreboding rain clouds and burning lungs forced us to modify this hike as well, allowing us to let go of the need to stand on top of the surrounding peaks.

it was a gorgeous basin and we all got to a nice lake at about 12,500 ft where we enjoyed our picnics. half of us then decided to head down before the rains and thunderstorms caught us, the other half decided to press on to the saddle and see the view. i, being in the former half, enjoyed the conversations i had on the way down and then opted to check out aspen with one of the couples. we didn't fit in with our grubby hiking clothes and matted camping hair, but we had fun saying "aspen" in a snooty voice and laughing at the fur clothing we saw parading the streets. we also indulged in a little espresso, which happened to be the best espresso any of us have ever had. leave it to aspen to have that claim!

on the drive home today we went through steamboat springs, which is a town we really liked. i think we will end up going skiing there a few times this winter. they have a gluten-free pizza place so we indulged in that and checked out the whitewater kayak park.

we are home now and i must pry our new laptop (wohoo!) out of my hands and go take a shower. although there is much homework and reading that i have to finish tonight, a nap just might be my first order of business.

our little laramie abode

2009-08-31T15:28:00.000-06:00

i finally got around to taking the pictures of our house. it is very comfortable, but when i look at it the photos, i realize how much my design eye is lacking. oh well, we are happy and cozy.

a little art to tie us to the northwest. the artist is from whidbey island--i treasure her work!

we love the light in the living room!

the intricacy of old houses makes me happy. gotta dig having a place to put treasured pictures and precious rocks!

our sanctuary of a bedroom.

our kooky little kitchen. surprisingly, i find having the fridge up on this shelf thing is very helpful! i am using things in the crisper drawer way more often, which means we are actually eating our vegetables before they go bad!

we have the rest of the photos up in our picassa album, which you can link to here.