Monday, July 9, 2012

last is better than DNF, right?

friday was one of those days where everything i touched fell apart--literally & figuratively. i couldn't get a project at work to go as i wanted, i got a call that harvey had jumped the fence,  i had to leave work early with tasks unfinished (due to said dog issue), & my bike broke on my urgent ride home (to collect said dog). i was huffing & puffing & ... irritated.

today has been one of those days too. i came home to change clothes to run to a meeting at the hospital i had forgotten about only to discover that the pesky nuisance of a dog had once again escaped our yard, my bike broke yet again (& more drastically) on my frantic ride home--to the point that i had to push it--the water pump went out in our van & had to be replaced to the tune of lots of money.

the weekend between friday & monday was lovely, but in the midst of the chaos i have not spent much time reliving the pleasant moments. brandon & i spent the weekend in the black hills, attended our friends' beautiful wedding, made a new friend at the trailhead, & took in mt rushmore. 

i sure wish that when chaos strikes i would be the type of person that calmly carries on. the person who has a clean car, an organized purse, & a routine for my day. in reality, i am the person who gets frustrated when the first thing doesn't go as planned, carelessly leaves things in the last place they were dropped, curses a lot under my breath, & generally makes the whole situation exponentially worse with my crabbiness. i have been a "crabby pattie" a lot lately.

the last time i raced in the local bike series i took last in my division. i wanted so badly to DNF because i was having major issues with my bike, but i decided i had come too far (& spent too much energy) to quit after the first lap. so i grit my teeth & pedaled it out in the one granny gear my bike would actually stay in. i was pretty bummed about my last place finish, although i jokingly consoled myself with the reality that someone has to be last. today i saw this little quote & it helped me get some perspective on my finish. 
from here.
so there you have it. i may not be my ideal version of myself that gracefully crosses the finish line or has a slick organization system for keeping all my bike stuff ready in our van, but i am the person that grits her teeth & finishes. sometimes you just have to embrace who you are. (although, i am working on cussing under my breath less often...)

1 comment:

Mom O said...

Sure it is!!! I admire you being out there 1st of all. But most of all sticking it out to finish. You go girl next race will be better. Maybe you should hire a better bike mechanic!