sporadic blogging

it feels like not much has been happening in our lives that is "blog worthy" since i returned from honduras. i suppose that is the way life works sometimes, with big, intense waves that leave silence and solace in their wake.

we have been steadily chipping away at house kitchen projects and brandon built a great built-in bench for the dining corner of our kitchen. this, of course, led us to have to find a new table because our other table was much too big to allow both the back door to open and access to the utensils, so each time we needed to get to one or the other we had to hoist the table a foot in the opposite direction. (does anyone else feel like all home projects are essentially variations of the if you give a mouse a cookie book? you can't even consider doing one project without 13 other projects suddenly requiring immediate attention!)

last week i had a training down in denver, so brandon joined me for a little work/leisure trip. while i spent the days being inundated on the techniques of motivational interviewing, he (mostly) kayaked in the whitewater park in golden, co. we also managed to completely fall for golden -- bike paths and great restaurants are everywhere and the life of the city seems to center around the river (and, the coors brewery, but alas...). it was fun to live the "city life" for a bit, but are hearts were both content to return to the quiet of laramie.

now that spring has finally appeared (the first leaves began to sprout on the trees just last week), we are looking ahead to yard improvements. i have my sprouts started for the garden and i'm hoping to get them in the ground about june 1, provided the snow doesn't plan to return. we have ordered sod and brandon is installing a sprinkler system, which will really transform our backyard. there are very few true pleasures in life that come in the form of instant gratification -- laying sod is one of them though!

our plan is to head to the black hills for memorial day weekend, but we just might scratch that in favor of sticking closer to home and tooling around the house.

complications and imperfections

i can't believe i have been back from honduras for over a month now. it seems like it was just yesterday, even though life in honduras, at least rural honduras, is worlds away from life in the states.

people keep asking how my trip was and it is incredibly hard to summarize with a soundbite.

it was complicated. it was rich and rewarding and it was painful and exhausting. it wasn't always clear that our being there was a good thing and our presence was certainly not without unintended consequences. but alas, this is life and, especially, international aide. 

i have come to learn that some things are just complicated. and we can fight this, we can wrestle it, we can resist it, we can ignore it. or we can acknowledge that very few things are as simple as we wish they would be and work continuously to make these flawed systems slightly less flawless. 

while i was in honduras i was reading Mountains Beyond Mountains, which proved to be perfect timing in terms of challenging my own issues with our trip through the way dr. paul farmer and his international medical service work relentlessly try to serve the poor. this book upset me and gave me hope in humanity all at once. while i highlighted hundreds of quotes from the book, one continues to resonate:  don't let perfect be the enemy of good (p. 160). 

i will admit that i am in that strange space between youthful naiveté and late-twenties/early-thirties bitterness. but one thing i took from this trip is that relationships are the vehicle for lasting, real, meaningful change and that if we focus on perfection, we are only going to be left with emptiness and brokenness. we must do the good we can with those we can reach. 

so with all that posturing and politicizing  here is the true story in pictures. i don't have many pictures of the children, because i don't have a way of making sure they don't mind if i share their faces on the internet. don't be fooled though, there were children everywhere--lack of accesible birth control and 97% catholicism will do that.

driving in tegucigalpa--for one brief second while the shutter opened the roads weren't packed; this was an anomaly.

hospital in la esperanza + recently decommissioned ambulance.

church and gorgeous tree in la esperanza (where we stopped over going in and out of honduras).

THE town of agua salada. literally, this is the whole town: church and school. 

one of the mango trees near my tent. we ate hundreds of mangos over the course of two weeks
and now the ones at home just don't compare.

church doors at the stations of the cross service i attended.

one of the nicer homes in the area.
just to the left of the frame is an incredible garden of the local herbalista.

these rocks were used to grind corn for tortillas, tamales, pupusas, etc.
i wonder how many hours the women of this house have spent using this?

no one has indoor plumbing and few have outdoor plumbing.
everyone has a pit-style toilet outside their home.

and everyone that has ever done any work abroad knows, futbol is the way to relationship.
and perhaps the path to peace? oh no, those post-futbol riots are pretty awful.

we went on many home visits, which were my favorite part of the experience.
we have no concept of hospitality in the US in comparison with the rest of the world--these people have next to nothing and they shared without a second thought.

as you can see, the roads are primitive and steep.
somehow every direction we went from agua salada was uphill. in 100+ degrees. youch.

most people arrived at our clinic after many hours of walking, but a few people came on horseback.

the clinic in operation.

my home for two weeks--the cozy little green tent.

we had a torrential downpour one day that left me stranded at the local school for two hours,
made the nearby road impassible, and soaked many people's things.
fortunately, my little tent held out and i stayed dry through the night.

the market in concepcion,
which was packed full of people and designed for hondurans (i.e., not for people exceeding 5'7")

this dog stood on the edge of this building (?) for hours, just looking out over the people at the market.
i'm not sure how he got up there or planned to get down.

with lots of cattlemen in the country, nearly every booth in the markets sell lassos and rope.

one of the social work students that went on the trip had never been camping,
riden in the back of a pick-up, or been on a horse.
honduras provided each of those experiences for her, which is ironic because those seem like
hallmark wyoming experiences.

this little dude has my heart. for whatever reason he and i hit it off so
wherever i went he wasn't far behind.
one afternoon i made up a card came and taught it to him. we sat and played "two kings" for hours
and then he started teaching it to his friends and family.
when i think about honduras now, i think about him and miss him immensely.

two of the days we were there were leisure days, both spent at waterfalls,
in hopes of escaping the 100+ temps.
this waterfall was just outside concepcion and was fun to sit underneath.
this picture is of one of the translators, demas, enjoying a back massage courtesy of the waterfall.

this was the waterfall we hiked to on our second leisure day.
we sat in the spray of the waterfall for three hours, enjoying the closest thing to air conditioning honduras has to offer. it was glorious!  

on the last night in agua salada we played spoons. all of the men in the community were entranced by the game and many got really into it. who knew spoons could be a way to connect despite language and cultural barriers.

i hope to return to agua salada regularly and to continue to improve our system and process for the betterment of the community. providing medical care is a form of social justice and an "area of moral clarity" (to borrow from dr. paul farmer) in terms of how we must share our wealth with the world. it is a situation “rare in the world, where what ought to be done seems perfectly clear. but the doing [is] always complicated, always difficult” (p. 103).

bound for central america

i leave tomorrow for 13 days in a rural, mountainous town in southwest honduras. i will be going with 19 nursing, medical, and social work students (plus a few actual nurses, doctors, and social workers [me]). i am expecting this trip to be exhilarating, exhausting, and life-changing. i came across this quote from anthony bourdain, which i plan to share with our group:
"Travel isn’t always pretty. It isn’t always comfortable. Sometimes it hurts, it even breaks your heart. But that’s okay. The journey changes you- it should change you. It leaves marks on your memory, on your consciousness, on your heart, and on your body. You take something with you… Hopefully, you leave something good behind."
this absolutely sums up my vision for this trip. i know we will have more good done for us than we will do for others and i know we will return bleary-eyed and conflicted about our privileges,  but i believe the gestalt of this trip will be something that will forever alter each of us.

this is a picture of the community where we will spend most of our time

p.s. i really hope the mark this trip leaves on my body is not in the form of chigger bites.

going private

my students just pointed out to me that they can find out a lot about me online. this is alarming to me so i think it is time i make this blog private. if you want me to include you in the permitted readers, i guess i need your email address to be able to allow you to view the blog. so put it in the comments or email it to me and i will set it up.

darn internet. and creeper students.

people, this is happening

oh how i love (and sometimes loathe) pinterest! today, i came across a pin that relates to my life list: swimming with manatees. sure, most people envision swimming with dolphins or whales--and i wouldn't oppose either of those opportunities--but i have always had a special affinity for the sea cow.

pinterest led me to this article in the new york times. apparently november - march is the season for manatees to swim up rivers in florida in search of warmer water. guess what? november - march is also the season lindsey thinks about getting the heck out of this frigid place i currently call home! fate? i think so.

hopefully i can swim with the manatees in kings bay before PETA outlaws this opportunity!

how can you not want to gaze into those little eyes?

picture via 

the progress continues (in photos)

this was our kitchen until about a month ago.
the cupboards, ceilings, and walls were multiple shades of greyish-lilac. 

the counters were a 60's style formica with gold flecks.

---

it has been a work in progress, but here are some photos of the journey our last month.

chaos, eh?

getting rid of the not-so-cool retro counter.

we used a heat gun to strip the paint off the cupboards.
i'm sure it wasn't entirely safe, but the 5 layers of paint had to go.

testing out the fit of our butcher block counter before
brandon spent a week and a half sanding, staining, and sealing it.

we painted the inside of the cupboards a sunny yellow and the outside pewter grey.

the lighting here is horrible, but we were very happy to install the counter.
brandon also reworked the center bank of cabinets and installed an outlet inside,
so we could get the microwave out of sight.

i was the fearless (yeah right!) tiler and brandon was my lovely assistant.

this best captures the color of the tile and countertop.
hopefully i can get some more photos in the daylight tomorrow.

the fruit bowl becky got us ties in so nicely with the penny tile!

i really love how it is coming together!

grey cabinets, walnut-stained butcher block counter, cobalt tiles, and blue cabinet knobs.
i love the combination!

we have a few cabinet doors and drawers to finish plus the crown molding to reinstall,
but phase I of the kitchen remodel is reaching the point
where we can see the light at the end of the tunnel!

for comparison's sake. yeah, it's getting much better!

i did it!

remember my intention for february? 

Do things without always knowing how they’ll turn out. i did it!

last night brandon, heath, and i were at our favorite local pub when i notice a man come in wearing a coat with st. charles embroidered on the chest. throughout the rest of our time in the pub i debated about approaching this guy and the woman he was with. i didn't want to be creepy, but i also just had a feeling that i should at least say hi. you know, show them some wyoming friendliness?

i swallowed my fear and decided to do something without knowing how it would turn out. after the initial, "how do we know you? oh, we don't" confusion, they were incredibly kind and got very excited to meet someone else from central oregon. we chatted for less than five minutes but i immediately felt like i had known them forever. 

they were in town because their daughter just had their first grandchild. their daughter works at the hospital i work at here in town, only she works nights in the emergency department, so i haven't met her. the woman insisted that her daughter and i would get along great and hopes we can meet. 

when i told them i was a social worker at the hospital, the husband cracked up laughing. turns out the woman is DIRECTOR of social services at st. charles! 

i still get tingly thinking about how that risky situation turned out so gloriously! i'm pretty sure i've got a good "in" should i ever apply to a social work job at st. charles. i am going to get in touch with their daughter and maybe set up a time to go out to coffee. 

isn't that small world incident refreshing? 

making it up as you go

"Take wrong turns. Talk to strangers. Open unmarked doors. And if you see a group of people in a field, go find out what they are doing. Do things without always knowing how they’ll turn out. You’re curious and smart and bored, and all you see is the choice between working hard and slacking off. There are so many adventures that you miss because you’re waiting to think of a plan. To find them, look for tiny interesting choices. And remember that you are always making up the future as you go."-Randall Munroe

i tend to be quite safe. a planner. brandon is a lot more comfortable with letting go and seeing what happens. we are good for each other in this way (among many ways). 

the photo above is not my own, but when i came across it on a photo blog i follow, i was immediately taken back to this incredible trip brandon and i went on in our first year of marriage. before the demise of the washington coast (as a result of the tourism twilight has generated) we trekked from seattle west to forks, where we met some of the saltiest people on earth before we set out on a 17-mile backpacking trip down the coast. we climbed up and down suspect ladders and ropes, from sandy beaches to the tops of ocean-side cliffs to washington rain-forests.  in the middle of march, we had 2.5 days of sunshine in the rainiest place in the US (hoh rainforest). it was glorious and unpredictable and invigorating. 

months later we read in backpacking magazine that the worst storm in the history of the area, which killed a backpacker on the exact same route we completed, occurred the night we left the trail. this has always rattled me a bit, in a "it could have been us" way. but it also points to the fact that while plans are important, they can be made in vain.

my intention for february: 

Do things without always knowing how they’ll turn out. 

life list

a great friend of mine, brenna, has this lovely list of things she wants to do before she dies. some of the items are grand and some are more everyday, but she constantly references this list and she inspired me to make a list of my own. i find myself telling brandon about the things i want to do "one day," but i don't have a place i really keep track of these things, so here goes...

life list
1. X-country ski in the Methow
2. Backpack through the Cinque Terre
3. Visit South Island of New Zealand
4. Become a transplant social worker
5. Get my LCSW
6. Learn Spanish
7. Ride a gondola in Venice
8. Get published in an academic journal
9. See the Northern Lights
10. See the Lion King on Broadway
11. See the Book of Mormon on Broadway
12. Stay in the Fairmont Banff Springs Hotel
13. Stay at a ski-in/ski-out slopeside condo
14. Buy a strangers’ meal
15. Kayak in the bioluminescent bay of Fajardo, PR
16. Raft the Grand Canyon
17. Adopt a child
18. Become a mom (see previous)
19. Own fainting goats
20. Go Orca whale watching
21. Own a cabin or lake house
22. Go to Disney Land without kids
23. Go to Disney Land with kids
24. Take our children on the Polar Express train
25. Send out family Valentine's Cards (instead of Christmas cards)
26. Visit Yosemite National Park in the summer
27. Master a head stand in yoga
28. Run a 10K
29. Do a mountain bike yurt tour
30. Go sailing, preferably in the San Juan Islands
31. Train Harvey to walk on a leash
32. See a show at The Gorge
33. Go to Telluride Bluegrass Festival
34. Swim with manatees
35. Vacation in St. Lucia
36. Keep bees
37. Go on a wine tour through Napa with Sara & Kem
38. Attend a Blazer’s game with Alex
39. Live on a ranch in the Gallatin
40. Establish a scholarship fund for first-generation college students at SPU
41. Have a French Bulldog
42. Attend Sundance Film Festival
43. Attend the Ellen Degeneres show with my mom
44. Eat GF cupcakes from BabyCakes
45. Walk or bike the Pilgrimage de Santiago
46. Eat at an Alice Waters restaurant
47. Vacation in Hana, Maui, Hawaii

the remodel begins

we've been widdling away at phase 1 of our multi-phased kitchen remodel.

here are a few details:

the penny tile backsplash we ordered today!

we originally bought a very "safe" and bland tile from home depot. as we were buying it i felt uneasy, but attributed the feeling to dropping lots of money. however, once we got the tile home and displayed it in the kitchen i could not stand it. i spent a few hours online and found the penny tile above on overstock. overstreets buying on overstock? its gotta work! hopefully this risky move turns out looking amazing once it is installed!

pewter grey cabinets with walnut stained butcher block counters

built-in dining nook to come...

i'll post more pictures of the process, which are messy and show just how much work this has been, but i needed a little reminder of the goal and thought folks might like to see our "vision."