week 23

it won't be long before i can't see my feet any longer.

how far along: 23 weeks

total weight gain/loss: not sure.

maternity clothes: yup, but i discovered H&M maternity line so that helped me expand my wardrobe a bit. (please save your lectures about the moral failures of buying cheap clothing because, yes, i know, i shouldn't be supporting a company like this, but i did...).

stretch marks: still none. (yet.)

sleep: getting slightly more difficult lately, due in part to my ability to stay asleep now and harvey's recent fondness for barking loudly in the middle of the GD night. ugh!

best moment this week: feeling her moving like crazy while i was in yoga class. i just broke out in a great big smile because i felt so connected to her!

movement: more and more, especially when i am still. perhaps this also impacts my lack of sleep.

food cravings: tillamook cheddar and icelandic-style yogurt (which is awesomely thick and has tons of protein!)

gender: female.

what i miss: being able to order a glass of wine at a restaurant. while i am drinking an occasional alcoholic beverage in the comfort of my home now that i am out of the first trimester, i don't feel right drinking in public or putting the server in an awkward position.

milestones: a few weeks back we got a call from the midwives that after the anatomy ultrasound they determined the baby was younger than we thought, so they moved the due date to dec 28. i got a little glum about the change, but i rationalized that i would rather have to adjust to a new due date at this point in the pregnancy than when i am DONE at the end. (i also secretly think they are wrong and that she will come closer to the original due date of dec 19. wishful thinking perhaps, but oh well.)

baby o updates

how far along: 21 weeks

total weight gain/loss: 8 pounds.

maternity clothes: a random combination of whatever fits my ever-expanding body (namely, my chest).

stretch marks: still none. (yet.)

sleep: inconsistent, but not horrible. and still entirely dependent on a that magic half tab of unisom. i might have to buy stock in this stuff. which reminds me, i think i might be out so an emergency trip to the store is now a must!

best moment this week: learning that our little baby o is a girl. somehow that makes this whole pregnancy thing feel less like i am harboring a parasite and more like i am growing a human being.

movement: she was moving so much during our ultrasound that we have to go back in a few weeks to allow the ultrasound tech to get all the required measurements. she clearly likes to bicycle kick her legs, which is fitting since she is joining this family.

food cravings: yumm! sauce and fresh tomatoes.

gender: so clearly a girl. we are getting more and more excited about this, as we were pretty surprised to learn we weren't having a boy.

what i miss: having a full day go by where i don't collapse on the couch in an afternoon haze.

milestones: realizing that the odds of our kiddo becoming a sponsored professional downhill mountain biker are actually much higher given that we are having a daughter. priorities, right? :)

and baby o is...

brandon and i were surprised today to learn that baby o is a girl, as we were both pretty certain it was a boy growing in there. so i guess a few of those "old wives tales" i shared last week might be on to something...

we are very excited, but have a lot of work to do in the name department and in terms of comprehending how one raises a daughter in a world that isn't always encouraging of women being themselves. for now, it is fun to say "she" and "her" instead of "it," as that moniker was not making me feel like we were expecting a baby.

there is no winning in this game

although we are far from parents [well, not that far; baby o is half-way cooked as of this week.], it seems to me that this whole parenting olympics competition is not for the faint of heart. who knew you could feel judgement about the decisions you make about parenting before you are even a parent?!?

the reality is that we are going to screw up and have to hang our head and admit that our "parenting plan" was naive. we will be wrong. a lot. hopefully we will be right a few times along the way too.

every time we tell people that we are pregnant we hear some version of "you two are going to be such great parents." there are some people that tell us this sincerely, but we have been hearing it so often that we have come to realize this is just what people say to people expecting a baby. [and now we wonder if every day might be opposite day?]

anyhow, it seems you can't win for trying, because someone somewhere [especially that wee bundle of joy] will condemn you for trying your darndest. i came across this list, and although it is a bit pessimistic, it is a humorous reminder for me that we are not even close to being in the running for the parenting olympics gold, silver, OR bronze. and i am ok with that.

PROOF THAT YOU ARE F*ING UP YOUR OFFSPRING NO MATTER WHAT

If you’re...	Then obviously...
Exclusively breastfeeding	THE BABY WILL NEVER SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT AND YOUR NIPPLES WILL FALL OFF, AND YOU’LL HAVE NO ONE TO BLAME BUT YOURSELF.
Exclusively formula-feeding	YOU’RE POISONING YOUR BABY, YOU MONSTER, DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT’S IN FORMULA? PRETTY MUCH JUST FECAL MATTER AND SCRAP METAL.
Sleep-training	YOU’RE ABANDONING YOUR BABY AND AS A RESULT IT WILL NEVER FORM A PROPER EMOTIONAL ATTACHMENT TO ANOTHER HUMAN BEING.
Not sleep-training	YOU’RE CODDLING YOUR BABY AND AS A RESULT IT WILL DEPEND ON YOU FOR THE REST OF ITS NATURAL LIFE.
Co-sleeping	IF YOU DON’T ACCIDENTALLY KILL YOUR BABY BY SMUSHING IT IN THE NIGHT IT WILL PROBABLY GROW UP TO BE A SEXUAL DEVIANT.
Introducing solids at four months	YOU MUST WANT YOUR BABY TO CHOKE TO DEATH, DON’T YOU?
Still feeding your one year-old purees	YOU MUST BE A COMPLETE AND TOTAL PUSSY.
Making your own baby food	WHAT, MORTAL FOOD ISN’T GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOUR PRECIOUS BABY, GWYNETH?
Not making your own baby food	CONGRATULATIONS, YOUR CHILD HAS JUST INGESTED ITS OWN WEIGHT IN ARSENIC.
Using disposable diapers	YOU MUST WANT TO SPEED UP GLOBAL WARMING WITH THOSE LITTLE SHITBALLS OF ETERNAL WASTE.
Using cloth diapers	YOU MUST BE THE TYPE OF HIPPIER-THAN-THOU MARTYR WHO ENJOYS BEING UP TO HER ELBOWS IN LITERAL CRAP.
Going back to work and hiring a nanny	YOUR CHILD WILL PROBABLY GROW UP CALLING YOU BY YOUR FIRST NAME
Staying home with your kid	YOU’RE NOT CONTRIBUTING ANYTHING TO SOCIETY. LEAN IN, GODAMMIT. LEAN INNNNNNNN!!!!!
Engaging your child in educational play every waking moment	YOU’RE A HOVERING PSYCHO WHO’S SABOTAGING ANY HOPE OF YOUR BABY LEARNING TO BE INDEPENDENT.
Letting your child watch Mythbusters while you blog and drink half a bottle of wine	YOU’RE A NEGLIGENT SLOTH WHO’S SABOTAGING ANY HOPE OF YOUR BABY GETTING INTO A DECENT COLLEGE.

sassycurmudgeon.com

i came across this some time ago, before we were even ready to talk about having a baby. it still rings true: 

gender neutral

first of all: i passed my licensed clinical social worker exam this week. it was a huge hurdle in this 2 year process. although getting my LCSW is important, it doesn't have major implications for my current  jobs. never-the-less, having this done will make me more employable down the road and will allow us to move to another state without me having to start the process all over again.

- - -

baby o seems to be doing well, as far as i can tell. he/she hasn't been moving a whole lot, but as soon as i got in the car after finishing my exam on tuesday i felt a ton of movement. i think i had a lot of stress hormones coursing through me in the weeks prior to the test, so i am sure that kept a damper on his or her activity.

we find out the baby's gender on monday. i am excited to see that little peanut bouncing around on the screen again, this time without the fear we had last time (at 13 weeks we had to have an unplanned ultrasound because the midwife couldn't find the heartbeat with the doppler). hopefully baby o won't be too modest, because i would really like to know what direction we need to go in terms of a name.

although i don't put too much stock in the "old wives' tales" of gender prediction, they are kind of fun to consider. here is the breakdown for us:

• chinese gender chart: girl
• bump height (neither high nor low): either 
• heart rate: girl
• sour or sweet cravings: either
• mayan even/odd rule: boy
• acne (no changes): either
• ring swing test: girl
• morning sickness: girl

from that list, the deck seems pretty stacked for girl, but i feel like this bebe is a boy. i guess we will have to wait and see what vida, the ultrasound tech, can reveal on monday!